A black kid, an Asian kid, and a Jewish kid walk into a barrier. They are students at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry and they walk straight through the barrier onto Platform 9 3/4.

Why did the Chicken cross the road? Actually it couldn't even walk because of all the hormones they injected into it in order to genetically enhance it's size and flavor.

Knock-knock. Who's there? Just open the damn door

Why was the thirteen year old raped by an online predator? Because he made very poor choices on giving out his personal information.

Noses are red, pilots are blue I am dyxslexic boo who

What do stuffed animals and living animals have in common? There both living except the stuffed animal.

A Priest and a Rabbi walk into a grocery store. As they walk past the meat section, the Priest stops, smiles, and turns to the Rabbi. "Feeling Hungry?" The Rabbi reaches down and picks up a pack of Koscher hotdogs.

A man walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender immediately tells him to leave as they don't allow pets.

Whats orange and has stripes? - a tiger

What did Tarzan say when he took out his knife? I took out my knife.

A man walks into a bar said man is escorted out of said bar said man may have died from a serious case of alcohol poisoning whilst in said bar he was escorted as dead people have trouble moving of their own accord experts discovered later that the man had actually been brutaly beaten by another man wielding a bar stool this shows that experts are not very smart

Ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmm Brian. Ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

What does an elephant and a red soda have in common? Neither collects stamps.

why was the man itchy? because he had herpies

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Richard fell off a cliff. He hit the pavement and died on contact. If only he knew he could fly.

So there were two palm trees on an island. The first palm tree says to the second, "Hey! What's up?" The second one replies, "Nothing much, just chilling." Except they were actually ice cubes.

There was a small boy with a lollipop and a spinning hat. He died of lieukemia.

Why was little timmy's arm crooked His mom tried to pull his arm off.

Why doesnt Mexico have a navy? Because cardboard doesnt float.

What's the difference between your mom and a toaster? A toaster won't period in your cereal bowl.

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Why was the boy sad? I don't know, ask him.

What do you call an Italian baby born with an extra toe? He was named Vincent Antonio Linguini and has been doing well with six toes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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