A black guy walks out of a house with a t.v. He proceeds to put it into a moving van and moves into his new house.

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what do you call a blind man who buys a caller i.d.? handicapped

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What's long, hard and full of seamen? A submarine.

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What can little Billy play? The tumour, sorry I meant what will little Billy die from.

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A drunk guy walks into a car

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Why did the boy break his leg? Because he fell off a building

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Pete and Repeat were on a boat. Pete jumped out, who was left? Pete, the boat blew up and instantly killed repeat

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Q: Why didn't i save my work? A: Because i didn't do any work?

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why does everyone like this website? ... because every other joke a little baby is dying.

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A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

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What do you call a fly without wings? A rather unfortunate physical disability

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know why the fuck he crossed the road, I don't know what he is thinking.

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What's worse than a dead baby in a trash can A hundred dead babies in a trash can Whats worse than a hundred dead babies in a trash can A live one at the bottom Whats worse than that It eats it way out Whats worse than that It brings friends

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What did the blind man say when you asked hi his favorite color? Nothing he is death too

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Mark Mark who? Mark Jennings. Oh hey, Mark, come in.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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I forgot what came after: Roses are Red Violets are Blue Too much anti jokes

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Is it true that curiousity killed the cat? No, I hit it multiple times with a baseball bat

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Honey, it really is such a tragedy that my sense of sight doesn't function properly. I've missed out on many beautiful things in my lifetime.

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What did the deaf guy get for Christmas? An iTunes gift card

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Yo Momma's so fat......... that she should probably start eating healthy and exercising more regularly or else she may be at risk of developing heart disease or diabetes

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what is the diference between my left tit and my right tit .... my right one was cut off because of breast cancer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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