Why couldn't the colorblind boy play Twister with his friends? He was a quadriplegic.

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Why did i get some thing to eat? Because i was hungry.

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Q: Who wants a chick with big breasts? A: Everyone apparently, because chickens are being genetically engineered that way because people are racist about what part of the chicken then want to eat. The white meat or the dark meat. Guess what? Now they can't walk because they are top heavy. And who's fault is that? The people who only eat the white meat.

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side -Tag

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What is the difference between an anti-joke and a joke? The word anti before anti-joke.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? a fish:)

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: No one knows, he was a chicken, and was not capable of human speech, so he never told anyone.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimers, Bus....

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why did the woman leave her husband? after years of mental and physical abuse she has decided to remove herself from the situation

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a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

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saftey torch you can out it on the porch. saftey torch put it in the hallway. saftey torch scare the monsters away. saftey torch that'll be 50 bucks.

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What do Austrailian cows say? Moo.

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Whats worse than finding out one of your grandparents died, finding out both your grandparents died.

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two mexicans are in a car, who's driving one of the mexicans!!!

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A white man, a black man and an asian walked into a bar. They got a drink and discussed multiple issues of the day and then went their seperate ways home.

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So a pirate walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink. The bartender then looks down and realizes that the pirate has a steering wheel on his penis. "Sir, are you aware that you have a steering wheel on your penis?" the bartender asks. "Arrrrrrr! It's driving me crazy! I just woke up one day and it was there!" The pirate replied. "Well you should probably get that checked out soon, it looks like it could be very harmful to your health and slightly uncomfortable. Not to mention your penis is out in the open." "You are right, what was I thinking?" The pirate agreed. He proceeded to get his friend to drive him to a hospital, for drinking and driving is not safe, and steering wheels on penises are not healthy.

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if you are reading this your wasting your time

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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What do you call a 5 year old with no friends? A sandy hook survivor

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Q: Why is Alzheimer not funny? A: To get to the other side.

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What would have happend if martin Luther king was white? I don't know he wasn't so it's irrelevant

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What do you do when your baby won't stop crying. Slit its throat

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what types of people have big noses? people whose parents both carried the recesive gene.

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Yesterday I was diagnosed with Depression... It made me sad.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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