Knock, knock! “Who's there?” “The Gestapo.”

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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Dude, you're never going to guess how stupid my friend Philip is! Really? What did he do?? Nothing. Philip will be attending the prestigious Princeton University next year and is therefore an incredibly intelligent human-being. You're an idiot for believing me.

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Why is it bees travel in formation, one side is longer than the other? ... There are more bees on one side

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Nate has 32 candy bars. he eats 28 of them. What is he left with? 4 candy bars

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Yo mama is so hairy she should probably start shaving.

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What's the worst part about male roller blading? AIDS.

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What is black, white and red all over? A nun in a blender

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One time, I ate 3 chipotle burritos....after a tennis match

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Your d*ck is short, If we compare it to mine. That was it, Thank you for your time.

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Why did the duck cross the road? To get cream cheese.

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What is worse then rain on your wedding day? Getting married.

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(in a retarted voice) i want to go to disneyland

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

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Where did all the time go? In a recent study, 100% of all time, all systems go.

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Why did Charlie fall? He got shot 24 times in the chest.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a trash can? 12- 18 (depending on size) I know this because i use to work at a abortion clinic

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What couldn't the stereotypical pirate get into the movie? Well, considering that the stereotypical pirate existed in the sixteenth to eightteenth centuries and the first motion picture wasn't made until the mid to late nineteenth century, also the technology for time travel does not exist nor has it ever, I would have to derive that he was not let in due to the fact that there was no way for him to ever exist at the same time that a movie would have been playing.

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live or die you decide to late time to die

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I love my valentine <3 Hes mine no matter what anyone says <3 Cause i love him with all my heart <3

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What did the republican say to the democrat? You suck!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your a Jew, I don't like you.

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How do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

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How do you fit 1,000 Jews in a Volkswagen? Trick question, you can't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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