Richard fell off a cliff. He hit the pavement and died on contact. If only he knew he could fly.

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

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What's similar between a flamingo and a rhino? They're both pink...except the rhino

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If you live in the 'living' room, what do you do in the others? You die.

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Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I Have Alzheimers, Cheese on Toast.

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They brutally whipped and tortured her.

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What is bright yellow and tastes like Gatorade? Antifreeze

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Your mommas so fat that she has developed adult onset diabetes.

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Christians

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a: How can you tell you are not pregnant? b: I don’t know. a: Like this: I’m not pregnant.

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This comment is anti to jokes.

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Why do Mexicans like to eat burritos? They are delicious.

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Why was the boy sad? Because he met Larry.

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Whats the difference between a black man and a pizza? A pizza is an inanimate object, while a black man is a person. racist F.u.c.k.

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what's harder than dodging bullets? dodging rain

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A black kid, an Asian kid, and a Jewish kid walk into a barrier. They are students at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry and they walk straight through the barrier onto Platform 9 3/4.

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Whats orange and has stripes? - a tiger

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What did one platypus say to the other? Whatever noise platypuses make. I'm not sure. I am sure that they lay eggs though.

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How many Facebook friends does George Bush have? None because he doesn't have a Facebook.

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What's the difference between a turtle and a bird? They both fly. Except the turtle.

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A horse walks into a Bakery and asks "Do you have any wheat bread?", and the Baker replies "No, we only have white bread." So the horse says: "Thats okay, I rode my bike today."

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What is white a can't climb up a tree? A fridge.

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pedophile

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Did you hear the one about the priest, the rabbi, the astronaut, the olympic diver, the mcdonald's employee, and the web designer? Neither did I...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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