What's cheese that's not yours? Mine.

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A man walks into a bar. "Ouch!" he shouted after he stubbed his toe on a table.

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you say "ask me if im a tree" he says "r u a tree?" you say"no..." then just stare at them

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why were the little boy's clothes all wet? because they found his body in the bottom of a river.

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Why don't women wear watches? In the technologically advanced age that we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

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A man walks into a bar and slowly draws a pistol and kills 5 people.

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Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Cause it looks like you landed on your face.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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Why did the boy cry? Because he was mercilessly beaten by his mother.

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Why do people discriminate against black people? Because they show an undeserving amount of disrespect towards the rest of the world and why should they get anything better than what they offer.

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a little boy told his friend he failed a test.. the friend replied that his parents r goin to kill him... to save himself the suffering ...the boy hung himself in his closet

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A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

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a young mother calf named near reality was milking itself and selling it at pathmark everyday for high prices he got a lot of money out of it and bought a big mansion where he also had a farm and collected prize show cows to show off to all of his cow friends.... he also bought gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons of prize show cow milk to drink to and build up energy for the cow show race coming up in the near fall. Every sunset he buys loads of milk to drink and feed his plants with. He plants lots of grass every day to eat and produce high quality milk goods. He was a wii, ps3, and xbox360 to play everyday and excercise his udder milk.

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Skittles are tasteless. Why? You can't taste the rainbow.

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What's purple and has four legs? I don't know. What? I DONT KNOW EITHER THAT'S WHY I'M ASKING YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it got hit by a truck

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What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Nothing. I lied about the deer.

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Whats worse than the Halocaust? Your mom

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I got a terminal disease and I'm going to die in six months. Mom if you're reading this I love you. Take good care of Joey.

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What do you call a black guy eating fried chicken? His name.

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a: How can you tell you are not pregnant? b: I don’t know. a: Like this: I’m not pregnant.

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Roses are Red Voilets are Red I am Red I am Dead

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knock! knock! who's there? mom mom who? your mom... your girlfriend just died in a car accident while carrying you baby...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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