roses are red and violets are blue so is your mums fanny

Knock knock, Who's there? Banana Banana who? Banana Smith, I'm here for the Smith Family Reunion.

What did one penguin say to the other Nothing, penguins don't talk.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

Why did the clock say 10:30? It was a digital clock!

Billy Mays and Michael Jackson are up in Heaven, because they died recently.

Take wrong turns

What has stripes, isn't a virgin, and has golden hands? I don't know I asked you first.

there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

What's red and funny? The holocaust

What's brown and smells like shit? The rapidly decaying bodies of several dead chipmunks.

What happened when the old woman crossed the road? A completely unrelated archery accident lead to the deaths of several people and thousands of dollars of property damage in another part of the country. The woman crossed without injury.

Did you know that in Africa, every 60 seconds... A minute passes. So sad

A man and his wife go out to dinner, after dinner they return home safely and the man kisses his wife good night. He then leaves his house, and goes to a bar with another women. He is a polygamast and it is socially acceptable in his village.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Hook. Hook who? Who are you Hooking Your Horns to?

Knock, Knock ...

Q:How many pieces of paper can one tree make? A:Trees cannot make paper, people make paper from trees. So the answer is none, a tree can't make any paper whatsoever.

You are the most beautiful person in the world.

What did the rich man say to the poor man? i feel sorry for you

Why did the chicken cross the road? Apple

What's the difference between two elephants? One is dead.

why did the Chinese guy take steroids? He didn't he's naturally small.

What do you call a dead guy under the ocean? Murder.

what do you call a brown man that has been repeatedly shanked and has been fucked up the arse by 10 Rag heads in one night and thrown in a well to slowly and painfully die? Lloyd.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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