Do I know any jokes about sodium hypobromite? As a matter of fact, I do. It goes: "Do I know any jokes about sodium hypobromite? NaBrO."

Your mother is so ugly corrective surgery would not be able to improve her appearance

Why did Timmy masticate in front of everyone at the dinner table? If he hadn't, he would have choked on large chunks of food.

An astronaut, a nun and a fireman walk into a bar. They all order something to drink as they have all had a busy day.

what will you never loose if you play world of warcraft your verginity

dickdickvdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdickdick

What do you call a horse that likes to box? A horse

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? lts of stuff like murder, rape, slavery, poverty, mindcontrol, mass genocide, the holocaust, racism, plagarism, physichal assault, war, terrorism, massacres, onsloughts, necrophillia, the dead rising, zombies, jokes on antijokes.com, awkward situations, dieing, cancer, ADHD, other mental illnesses, paint, the grim reaper, shinigami, stereotyping foreigners, prejudicism, bullying, armed robbery, hacking, viruses, incest, feral animals, getting lost in the forest, arsonry, pyromania, passing out in a bar, meeting a serial killer, and finding 2 worms in your apple.

A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

What did the man say when he saw a giant herd of elephants coming? "Look! There's a giant herd of elephants coming!"

Why did the man fall off of his bike? He was hit by a car and died in a tragic accident.

Why did the chicken cross the road? like most animals that wander onto the road, it was completely unaware that the road can be very dangerous. It didn't go onto the road on purpose, it simply treated the road as if it was just like the rest of the ground.

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

A German challenged an Englishman to a duel But their neigbours found out and alerted the police

A wise man once said a journey of a thousand steps starts with one step. The wise man also smoked weed and starved to death in a cave.

what gets louder as it gets smaller? a baby in a trash compacter.

What was black, then white, now dead all over? Michael Jackson.

The t rex said to the textbook ............. Im not going to read you

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting your car repossessed.

Why did the gir fall off of the swing? She had no arms.

why cant little timmy ski? he was born without legs.

you just read an anti-joke

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

Why couldn't Billy see the show? Because Billy is blind.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...