- Anti Joke

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why are you worrying about the chicken? You just got shot.

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Why was Mary mucky? Because she was dragged to a field and raped

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Obamacare

josh- your a strange boy. liam- yes. due to by up bringing i have been exposed to unusual situations that most people do not encounter therefore affecting how i behave. Secondly the definition of normal is varying from person to person making being normal to every human being difficult to even the most capable of people. Essentialy Josh i care little for you comment. josh was a black man who died of cancer 6 weeks after this incodent

boys

What's black and white and red all over? A car in which some young hoodlum appears to have splashed a fair amount of red paint over the owner's otherwise charming checker pattern.

What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eyepatch? Names.

So a man walks into a bar carrying a giant clock. One of his friends asks, "Hey, whats up with the clock?" His friend then responds, "A goddamned genie gave it to me, i can't take it anymore. Here take his lamp." The man decided to rub the lamp and thinks to himself, "Gee, I'm gonna wish for 1 million dollars." The genie comes out and asks the man, "What wish could i grant you today?" The man says, "I wish i could have 1 million dollars!!" The genie replies, "As you please." All of a sudden, a studded dog collar appears. Then another, and another. Soon there were 1 million dog collars in the bar. The man yells, "WHAT IS THIS?!?! I DIDNT WISH FOR 1 MILLION COLLARS!!!" His friend then replies, "I didn't wish for a giant clock either...."

There was an old lady from Ealing Who had a peculiar feeling She lay on her back Opened her crack And pissed all over the ceiling The old lady then lay in her own waste for over two weeks due to neglect by uncaring nursing home staff. Six months later, a hidden camera documentary on underperforming care homes exposed the abuse and neglect and the old lady went to live with her son and his family. In the early hours of May 14th 2011, the whole family were killed in a house fire that gutted the home and saw fires spread to neighbouring houses. Firefighters say the blaze originated in the spare room and was caused by exposed wiring on an electrical blanket. Forensic experts said that the repeated urination on the blanket would likely corrode the wiring due to the acidic content of urine.

roses are red pickles are green i like your legs and whats in between

Why was the baker rich? Because he had a lot of money

Why couldn't my grandpa use a cell phone? He didn't have hands.

what's worse then a blowjob?

Why isnt there a womens NASCAR? Because NASCAR does not yet have the funding to start a women's league.

I am iron man 24 flavors in my van i am the icecream man i have met jackie chan

A horse walks into a bar, and orders a drink. The bartender is amazed at first, but then remembers that he just did acid.

What is blue and feels like fluff? Blue fluff

Huh, I never succeeded in any of those, and I tried a lot. Please tell me you never gone with something nasty like that...

Why was Hellen Keller a bad driver? She was a woman.

A blind man cant see this joke, so I probably shouldnt write it..

Q: How did the black man own the Lamborgini? A: He was 2 Chainz.

On a scale of 1 to Chris Brown how angry are you?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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