How do you stop a run-away bus? You sit down in the driver's seat and gently place your foot on the brake pedular and proceed to press it down. The brake pads, located in the calipers, will squeeze the brake discs and slow the bus eventually to stop at the crosswalk for the old lady accompanied by a young boy scout to cross the street and continue their wonderful lives.

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What is green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

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I used to be an Adventurer like you... But then I decided that it was a dangerous form of employment and stopped.

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what does a jew want most for hanukkah? presents

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A frog found a smoking cigarette on the road, so he/she takes it, smokes it, and explodes.

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Ever since I've been using chloroform as cologne I've been getting laid a lot.

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Why was the boy sad? His friend stabbed him with a fork. Also, his mother died. Also, his dad raped him Also, he has a chode. And it really sucks when you have a chode.

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Richard fell off a cliff. He hit the pavement and died on contact. If only he knew he could fly.

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women sitting on a bench quietly. they have no ability to speak.

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A fish walks into a bad Fish dont walk

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Your momma's so fat...

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Why did the baby cross the road? cause it was stapled to the chicken.

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Why do black people eat fried chicken? Because it's delicious.

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What's sad about a house on fire?, it was my house.

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A horse walks into a bar... Horses are not indigenous to China.

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Roses are gray, violets are gray, everything's gray, bitch im a dog.

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Whats funnier than a anti-joke? 911

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There was an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman... They all died in a horrible train wreck.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms.

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whats the hardest part of roller skating. Telling your dad that you are gay.

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Q: What did the mime say to the crowd gathered at the crime scene? A:

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Why was the woman making a sandwhich in the kitchen? She was hungry.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartenders says, "why the long face?" The horse doesn't respond because horses do not comprehend English. He then becomes startled by his surroundings and bolts out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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what's harder than dodging bullets? dodging rain

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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