If you're American when you go into the bathroom, and American when you come out, what are you inside? American! What are you, a communist?

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't.

What is the difference between a dead baby and a bowling ball? You can't pick up a bowling ball with a pitchfork.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing.

A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

whats white and smells like black paint? nothing, white paint even though it is still paint has a slightly different smell due to the difference in dye colors used to make it

Roses are red violets are blue ... Aww I just don't give a damn and nether do you.

How many dyslexics does it take to screw in a light bulb? Dyslexia is a cognitive learning disability characterized by the sufferer's inability to fluently spell, speak and read. Being a intellectual disability, the chances that dyslexia could impair the practical functionality of a sufferer are very slim and hence it it is highly probable that it would only take one dyslexic to change a light bulb in the simplest of conditions. However, to definitively answer this question, I would have to know a range of variables such as the height above the ground at which the light socket is mounted, the physical height of the dyslexic, the voltage and amp characteristics of the light-bulb itself, the physical well-being of the dyslexic etc. These variables are unknown, are not mentioned in the initial question (as is common for this type of question) and hence, I cannot answer this question to any degree of accuracy.

I just lost the game where if you think about the game then you lose the game. so did you.

How do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

Why do Jewish people like money so much? Because they can exchange it for goods and services

Q: What did the mime say to the crowd gathered at the crime scene? A:

how do you stop a baby crying hit it with a brick.

What would be funny? Seeing justin beiber 's penis.

what did the duck say to the chicken .nothing

Why can't Michael Jackson drive? Because he's dead.

Why did the monkey fall out the tree? Because he was dead.

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Knock, knock! “Who's there?” “The Gestapo.”

Why did little Jimmy eat his finger ? He was hungry.

Did you hear about that show where two crazy guy got on stage and the show had to be canceled. I didnt either.

What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint

A guy vociferiously kills another person- fueled by the incentive of personal gain provided by his rapacious, human nature. He is an army soldier who's triumphant in battle and hoping to recieve a promotion. However, ultimately all he did was essentially insignificantt and his acts of purported valor were diametrically unnoticed by all except for his closest friends/allies. He never did supass his original self of a soldier and died of a natural cause that was disclosed only to the members of his immediate family.

Why did the little girl fall off the swing set? She had no arms.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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