Knock knock? Whose there? Colin Come in

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Q. How many puns does it take to make a cup of tea? A. None. A pun is a grammatical construct and as such is incapable of combining the ingredients necessary to generate a hot drink which has been popular for hundreds of years.

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What the difference between a ferarri and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a pile of dead babies in my garage. That would be murder.

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The ability to live the life of a dead person.

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How long does it take a person to steal a television? Many variables could determine said ability to successfully steal a television. Such variables depend on sub-variables such as weight of the television, whether the television is a store, an upper-class citizen's home, or in a "ghetto" apartment. A main variable could be the race of the thief in question. African Americans are scientifically more likely to steal a television faster compared to a Caucasian. Yet a downside to being an African American is the fact that they are more likely to be called in for questioning or arrested on the spot at their broken down home. Caucasians are less likely to be questioned and if caught will most likely obtain the proper amount of bribery money in which to pay off the police.

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I also wanted to write a joke but I forgot it so here I am. Minecraft rocks and everyone who says otherwise is a noob

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why did the black man leave his home because there was a hurricane that would have killed him if he stayed.

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Q: What's worse than ten dead babies nailed to one tree? A: One baby nailed to ten trees.

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When life gives you lemons.... Don't eat them, because you're probable hallucinating, and you don't know where they came from.

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A duck walks into a bar. A horse walks into a bar. A cow walks into a bar. A bear walks into a bar. The owner tells them to get out, but they can't understand humans. So they just stayed there.

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What did the mental patient say to the apple? Hi, my name is Chris.

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A man walks into a bar. He is an alcohol and it is killing his family.

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every man comes from between a women's legs for the rest of their lives they try to get back in

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Your momma is so fat that she decided to begin an exercise program and eat healthy and she lost weight.

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what do you call a polar bear in a bathtub? No soap, radio

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HAHA HEHE... WOW that was a good one! i didn't get it...

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What did the guy say to the girl when she was on her knees? Stop playing with it put it in your mouth

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Hey! That's mine! Give it back!

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whats worse than a baby impaled on your lawn... the universe being consumed by a giant albino ape with over sized testicles

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What do you get when you cross a bungie cord and an owl? My ass :)

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why did the chicken cross the road............ why dont you tell me smartass

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Why can't Micheal J. Fox draw a perfectly straight line? It is impossible for humans to draw perfect lines.

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Q: When you have alot of hair, what are you? A: Obease

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once upon a time a guy thought he wrote an original anti joke but it wasnt

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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