What's yellow and dangerous? China.

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As a teen girl was walking through the perfume shop, she picked up one called, "Swirly Paradise." She sprayed it on her and sniffed the sweet scent. Suddenly, the world spun around and she suddenly woke up inside an empty bra. A mouse sniffed her and ate her alive.

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What's the difference between Santa Claus and Tiger Woods They both have beards... EXCEPT FOR TIGER WOODS.

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Why did the man mysteriously disappear? Because he was hiding without telling anyone that he was hiding.

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Want to hear a joke? Me to...

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Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Give a man a gun and he'll build you a refrigerator.

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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What's purple and has four legs? I don't know. What? I DONT KNOW EITHER THAT'S WHY I'M ASKING YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE!

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A blind man walks into the door of a bar

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Nothing. I lied about the deer.

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What's brown and says "Hey, I'm a dog"? A talking dog, able to grasp the English language.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Donald Trump Donald Trump who? I already told you my full name. You're fired!

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Your mommas so fat that she has developed adult onset diabetes.

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a: How can you tell you are not pregnant? b: I don’t know. a: Like this: I’m not pregnant.

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A man walks into a bar and the the llama next store sprouted wings and flew Then a potato says hi to a iPod but unfortunatly the iPod can't talk. Meanwhile hello kitty and ducks wage a nuclear war and the rise of ostriches Started. The a giant cucumber started falling of mt. Everest and killed many Flying platipuses were saved. Then aliens started invading and the world ended.

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2 ducks walk into a bar. The first orders a drink, drinks it, and drops dead. The other duck said, "Bar tender! What did you put in my friends drink?" The bar tender said, "Poison."

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Why did little Jimmy eat his finger ? He was hungry.

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Did you hear about that show where two crazy guy got on stage and the show had to be canceled. I didnt either.

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Where does the king keep his armies? In a variety of military barracks and bases situated around his kingdom where they are ready to be deployed for combat or peacekeeping operations.

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Why was the thirteen year old raped by an online predator? Because he made very poor choices on giving out his personal information.

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What did the furnace say to the Jew? Nothing, as it is an inanimate object and cannot communicate.

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Knock Knock Who's there? 9/11 9/11 Who? You said you'd never forget.

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So there's this mexican with a big sombrero riding a donkey, it was a sunny day and he didn't feel like walking.

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What's the worst part about male roller blading? AIDS.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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