Whats worse than contracting H.I.V.? nothing

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-rick:hey wut happens wen i pull this pin -jerry:rick no!!!!! rick then starts to cry as he remembers the tragic accident that caused his friends death,which rick caused

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Why was the boy sad? Because he met Larry.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing set? She had no arms.

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What's yellow and has six legs ? A cat. I may be wrong about the color and the legs, I'm color-blind and I can't count.

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What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor? I don't eat hot dogs. Thank you though.

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Q: what is more sad than being alone A: being alone with lots of cats

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What's the difference between a black man and a Jew? Nothing, he's the same person

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What's the difference between a turtle and a bird? They both fly. Except the turtle.

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Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says its getting hot in here the other muffin say holy shit a talking muffin.

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how do you get a cow in the fridge? Open the fridge, and insert. How do you get a kangaroo in the fridge? Take the cow out and insert What animal is not in the lion king? kangaroo --WHY hes still in the fridge

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What does an elephant and a red soda have in common? Neither collects stamps.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? A scorpion was trying to sting it in the anus and it wanted to escape the undoubtedly painful consequences.

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How many republicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Typically only one, though more may be required under extreme conditions.

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a:two guys are white but one of the guys can only see black and white so he said dude you black he said no so they have a race who won :nobody they both got hit by a bus then a car then a donkey eaea then a horse

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A man walks into a bar and slowly draws a pistol and kills 5 people.

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Why can't women drive? Actually, they can as long as they legally acquire a driver's license and have no existing restrictions.

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What is the worst part about being a black Jew? Having to sit at the back of the gas chamber.

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A man walks into a bar. "Excuse me sir," he asks, "may I have a beer?" "No," says the bartender.

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What's the difference between your mom and a toaster? A toaster won't period in your cereal bowl.

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What did the English teacher write on a sheet of assignment criteria? The assignment criteria. Plus, she spelled "millennium" wrong.

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What is pink and smells like green paint? Pink paint

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Animal cruelty

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what's the difference between natives and dogs? people enjoy having dogs in their houses

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops