Why does Jonny have a phobia birds? Because he has one glued to his face.

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What did Tarzan say when he took out his knife? I took out my knife.

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How many republicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Typically only one, though more may be required under extreme conditions.

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To be honest that sounds like more of a mental health issue and not something I'm qualified to deal with as a GP. Let me refer you.

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Why did the vegetarian only work one day? Because her co-workers are cannibals.

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Jesus

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

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An English man a Scotts man and an Irish man buy a helicopter between them,they go to pick it up after paying for it and realise that non of them can fly it. so they get a refund and go to the pub.

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what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

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Why was little timmy's arm crooked His mom tried to pull his arm off.

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what is darker than black?... YOU

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If Barbie is so popular...why do you have to buy her friends?

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What a vase and a cheeseburger have in common? It has it's price.

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What's the difference between an orange? Mooses don't like to wear sweater-vests.

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What did the girl get for her birthday? Nothing...cause she died

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Have you heard of Helen Keller's dog? No. Neither has she

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

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Your mama is so fat she is morbid obese.

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What did the man say to the man? Awkward.

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What cheese is not yours? The one that you didn't buy.

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Did you hear the one about the priest, the rabbi, the astronaut, the olympic diver, the mcdonald's employee, and the web designer? Neither did I...

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what do giraffes have that other animals don't have? -baby giraffes

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What do you call a black man without a job? Unemployed.

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What can be any colour and is made of leather? Cars. I lied about the leather part.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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