Your momma is so fat, she doesn't have a birthday. She has a birthweek.

Why do dogs chase squirrels? Beacuse dogs have very low attention spands and also chase cars and cats.

the next time someone says "yolo" im going to pull out my shotgun and reply "sadly..."

What did the Chicken say to the Turkey Nothing, Chickens don't talk.

What did goldilocks say to the three bears? she was savagely murdered before she could say anything.

What is worse than breaking your pencil? Flying on a magic carpet

How many Jews can you fit into a car? Depending on the size of the car, you should be able to safely fit somewhere between 2 and 8.

Whats the difference between cats and dogs? ....cats suck

21

An elderly man farts during Sunday morning mass. The children around him laugh and then their parents remind them to be respectful.

A heavily drunk man walks into a bar and proceeds to die of alcohol poisoning.

A priest, a rabbi and a proctologist walk into a bar. Why is there a bar lying in the middle of the sidewalk?

What do you call an Arab driving a Plane? A Pilot.

womens rights.

When I grow up, I don't want to be a therapist. I have enough trouble figuring out the problems in my math book.

What did the elephant say to the zebra? Nothing, elephants can't talk.

Q. What do you call a headless boy in a river A. A headless boy, in a river.

How many kids with Asperger's does it take to change a light bulb? Tyrannosaurus lived in the Cretaceous Period.

A man walks into a bar. He bumps his head on the iron and has headaches for a week.

They say you are what you eat, but i don't remember eating a big bowl of sexy.

if dragonflies have purple toe nails, then how many pancakes does it take to build a doghouse? canada, because snakes don't have armpits!

Parents who drive with children on their lap should be wrapped with a huge diapper

I contracted AID's from a prostitute So I went out and killed 4 gay since they are the most prominent carriers of the disease I also killed a black man I kill a black man everyday

Actually, Red Bull helps temporarily restore wakefulness when experiencing fatique or drowsiness.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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