A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

Why coulden't the fish swim? He got poked in the eye with my nipple. My nipples get really big when I'm swimming in cold water.

Why did the child drop it's lollipop? Because they got hit by a bus.

Why did the black man perform well? Because he was a well trained musician by the name of Stevie Wonder.

What's the difference between donuts and dead babies I don't have a pile of donuts in my garage

a 12 year eld Maxican girl is aksed to spell the werd newmonia she gets it rite and wins the spalling beef which makes me sad bcuz English is my forst langage and i still dont get it and im 25

what did the mexican firefighter name his two sons. Ryan and Mike.......

Why do women wear make-up and perfume? Because they are ugly and they smell bad.

Why did the kitten die? Because your mom is gay.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares?

What do you get if you cross a chicken and a potato? Answer- Chicken tasted potato

What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A pilot

A black guy, a Mexican guy and a Jew walk into a hospital. They are all undergoing the same chemotherapy treatment.

panda bears are racist to mexicans-they are black, white and asian

Your momma's so ugly that she was worried that she would never marry anyone.

A fat man on a moped

Why did Aodhan not come into school? He was sick.

Have you heard of Helen Keller's dog? No. Neither has she

What happens if Pinocchio says "My nose is about to grow." Nothing, Pinocchio was a fictional character created by Walt Disney.

A man walks into a bar... But, it's not funny because he's an alcoholic and it's destroying his family.

Q. Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone? A. He got attacked by a dog.

"Ask me if I'm a tree." "Are you a tree?" "No."

3 jews are walking into a bar. the first jew orders a shot of vodka, drinks it and says "long live my family!" the second jew orders a shot of whiskey, drinks it and says "long live my friends" the third jew orders water, because he is the one that is driving tonight.

Roses are Red Voilets are Red I am Red I am Dead

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...