Roses are red, Violets are blue, I got a terminal disease and I'm going to die in six months. Mom if you're reading this I love you. Take good care of Joey.

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A black man, a Jewish man, and a gay man walk into a bar. They are all good friends who want to enjoy drinks together.

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Why did the old woman put roller skates on her rocking chair? She had dementia.

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what do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? names.

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Q. Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone? A. He got attacked by a dog.

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Why did the monkey fall out the tree? Because he was dead.

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whats silver and cries? a coin, although it can't cry because its a coin. So it's just silver

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Inquiry: After the specially hired detective in shades of black had managed to finish his secret investigation of the crime scene, what significant affair did he demand and expect to subsequently occur next in the logical chain of events? Answer: A specific transaction of money. To elaborate, immediate providance of previously allotted recompense in the particular configuration of myriad pristine wads of cash.

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you.

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-rick:hey wut happens wen i pull this pin -jerry:rick no!!!!! rick then starts to cry as he remembers the tragic accident that caused his friends death,which rick caused

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was recently released from prison for violent crimes.

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I'm gonna put my nut-sack on your drum set

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The white guy did it!

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What's the worst part about male roller blading? AIDS.

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Why coulden't the fish swim? He got poked in the eye with my nipple. My nipples get really big when I'm swimming in cold water.

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Why was timmy crying? He gave his grandmother AIDs...

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Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Cause it looks like you landed on your face.

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Q. The square root of 69 is 8 something, right? A. Yes, to be exact it is 8.30662386.

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women sitting on a bench quietly. they have no ability to speak.

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What's sad about four black people in a Cadillac driving off a cliff? Jerome never wanted it to end like this. James, his best friend, was drunk... Again. That was just the way he was. He got wasted, did something stupid, apologized, and then did it again. But this time, there would be no next time. They were supposed to be going to their graduation party, but instead, James fell asleep at the wheel. The cliff was rapidly approaching, and the doors were locked. All Jerome could do now was pray. Also, the Cadillac costed a lot.

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What's similar between a flamingo and a rhino? They're both pink...except the rhino

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Why did the pollock jump into the sea? A pollock is a fish.

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I Hear Boston Is having a blast.

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girl says..joe..................................................................... boy says...who is joe................. girl..the idiot of a helper at my skl

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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