Knock knock. Get out!!

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was stapled to a donkey

Why did the football player walk so funny? He went to Penn State!

A man walked into a bar making it immediately apparent that he had no future in competitive limbo.

A Jew, a Christian, and a Muslim walk into a bar and have a friendly argument over their religious beliefs.

One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMMBBBWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

Yo mama so stupid that when she missed the 44 bus, she took the 22 twice instead

How can you tell if an elepant has been in your refrigerator? It has been destroyed.

Why is the man's nose bleeding? Because I punched him in the nose. He looked at me funny.

What's purple and has four legs? I don't know. What? I DONT KNOW EITHER THAT'S WHY I'M ASKING YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE!

so a salesman knocks on a mans' door and asks if he would like to hear a salespitch but the man didn't answer he came back two minutes later and knocked and asked if the man would be intrested in some girl scout cookies and the man tore the door off the hinges.

walk into your friend’s house and say “what’s up with the dead guy out front?” (you have to murder a person for this joke to work)

Did you know that if you rearrange the letter in "Gill Lube", you can spell "Gullible"?

A kid walks into a bar and the bartender yells, "Get Out!"

How did the blind dyslexic boy find his way out of the cornfield? -He drew backwords numbers and letters in the dirt

Why didn't George Washington get his drivers license? Cars were yet to be invented.

If life hands you lemons your probably hallucinating.

What did Pablo experience during his first day in private school? the atmosphere of a private school

Tim: You wanna hear an anti-joke? Billy: Yes! Tim: Okay, I've got one for you Billy: Let's hear it! Tim: 1

You know what's gay? Grabbing another man's penis.

What did the man on the moon say? Nothing. He died because his supply of oxygen ran out.

How does Hitler tie his shoes? With little Nazis.

What does it mean when your dog goes to the bathroom on your floor? He hasn't been very well potty trained By: robobob123

How did young Austin get home while walking on the side of the street ? He didnt. He was hit by a car.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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