What's the difference between a turtle and a bird? They both fly. Except the turtle.

What do snowmen eat for lunch? Snowmen don't eat, they're inanimate balls of of solid precipitation with rocks for smiles and eyes and carrots for noses.

Knock Knock Who's there? 9/11 9/11 Who? You said you'd never forget.

pedophile

What's cheese that's not yours? Mine.

knock knock. who's there pismil pismil who pigsmil cookies

Why wouldnt NASA send a blackman into space without a space suit? Because space is a vacuum there is no air no atmosphere the tempurature is almost zero kelvin so if you ever go out int space please dont take off your helmet out there because you would freeze to death almost instantaniously.

wats worse than gettin bitched at by ur mom? gettin raped by a giant scorpian n getting SUPER ULTRA MEGA AIDS

There was a small boy with a lollipop and a spinning hat. He died of lieukemia.

What is the difference between obama and a hobo. NOTHING

There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

The big problem with politicians is they're always lying but fortunately there's always a moment when it's not a problem anymore. When they do it down in their tombs.

What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A pilot

panda bears are racist to mexicans-they are black, white and asian

Why did the man mysteriously disappear? Because he was hiding without telling anyone that he was hiding.

Want to hear a joke? Me to...

What's purple and has four legs? I don't know. What? I DONT KNOW EITHER THAT'S WHY I'M ASKING YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE!

How do you get a plumber to cry? Kill his family

Knock knock. Who's there? Awkward silence Awkward silence who? ...

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it got hit by a truck

How do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

What's brown and says "Hey, I'm a dog"? A talking dog, able to grasp the English language.

Why was the chicken mad? Because he was sick of everyone questioning him even when he crossed the road.

What did the African boy get for his Christmas present for the first time? Leprosy

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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