What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot.

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How do you fit 100 babies in a bucket? put them in a blender. How do you get them out? potato chips.

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Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Cause it looks like you landed on your face.

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wats worse than gettin bitched at by ur mom? gettin raped by a giant scorpian n getting SUPER ULTRA MEGA AIDS

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? 1. Discovering your "girlfriend" is a man 2. The Holocaust 3. Being Raped 4. Being Raped by a Giant Scorpion-Panda Hybrid 5. Being Raped by a Giant Scorpion-Panda Hybrid who doesn't wear protection.

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A barrel of monkeys is only a barrel of laughs if they're alive and telling jokes.

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

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How do you make a man sit down? Hold him at gunpoint.

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knock knock whos there? your mother your mother who? ...........what?

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Chuck Norris can watch TV.

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Kony 2012

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What did the girl get for her birthday? Nothing...cause she died

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Why did Aodhan not come into school? He was sick.

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A priest and a bunch of boys are in a room. They are having choir practice.

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A nun, a jew, and a KKK member are all stuck together in a lifeboat. A large wave overturns the boat and they all drown.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Cheese.

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whats black. an african american person

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equality for women

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Why do Mexicans like to eat burritos? They are delicious.

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Wumbo

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a duck walks into a bar, sits down and asks for grapes. the bartender says, "no, we don't serve grapes." so the duck leaves. the next day the duck goes back to the bar, takes a seat. "got any grapes?" the bartender says, "i already told you we don't serve grapes here. if you come in here and ask for grapes one more time, i'm going to staple your beak to the wall!" the duck leaves. the next day, the duck returns, sits at the bar and asks, "got any staples?" the bartender replies, "no, but there's an Office Max next door where you might find some."

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QUESTION: Why do black people do so poorly in school? ANSWER: Some statistics point to genetic disparities in intelligence between races, but others say it is due to more complicated social factors.

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The night is always darkest just before the dawn. Just kidding I'm Helen Keller, everything's always dark.

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What do snowmen eat for lunch? Snowmen don't eat, they're inanimate balls of of solid precipitation with rocks for smiles and eyes and carrots for noses.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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