Whats better than winning a Paralympic Gold Medal? Having Legs.

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Cheese.

Inquiry: After the specially hired detective in shades of black had managed to finish his secret investigation of the crime scene, what significant affair did he demand and expect to subsequently occur next in the logical chain of events? Answer: A specific transaction of money. To elaborate, immediate providance of previously allotted recompense in the particular configuration of myriad pristine wads of cash.

What do birds need when they're sick? Medical attention

roses are red, violets are blue when ever l flush the toilet i think of you

why was the little girl crying? because her dad hit her.

Why did the deaf man go to the concert? He had recently acquired a brand new hearing aid which meant that he was able to hear much better and decided that he wanted to listen to some music.

Why did the girl say 'baa'? Because she was a lamb.

knock knock whos there ? Jordan Jordan who ? Jordan Walters

Knock Knock Who's there? It's the postman, I have a package you need to sign for.

What did the idiot call his pet zebra? Charlie. The fact that the man is an idiot is irrelevant.

What do you get when you cross a rhino and an elephant? Two angry pachyderms.

knock knock who's there ? dogs dogs who? phone

A man walked in a bar had 4 drinks and walked home because drunk driving is dangerous

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How do you make a clown stop smiling? hit him with an axe

why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a terrorist -lschles

a duck walks into a bar, sits down and asks for grapes. the bartender says, "no, we don't serve grapes." so the duck leaves. the next day the duck goes back to the bar, takes a seat. "got any grapes?" the bartender says, "i already told you we don't serve grapes here. if you come in here and ask for grapes one more time, i'm going to staple your beak to the wall!" the duck leaves. the next day, the duck returns, sits at the bar and asks, "got any staples?" the bartender replies, "no, but there's an Office Max next door where you might find some."

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was forced to against his will by a group of marauding ninjas who happened to be strolling by at the time.

how many indians does it take to screw in a light bulb? one if it can reach 2 if it's high.One to screw in the bulb the other to hold the ladder.

What has two legs and graduated from ninja school? Okyrin Sakajuru. He also went on to win two all city titles and roundhouse kick of the day, performed on a wild tiger. As time passes, he stops practicing and becomes a lethargic street criminal. He is eventually captured by local authorities and charged with the robberies and two counts of aggravated assault. Leaving his children behind to the system where they are neglected and depressed about their fathers situation. He makes bail after 3 months and opens a strip club for dwarfs but loses it all after not finding stripper poles that are dwarf friendly.

Ask me how old my cat is. How old's your cat? I don't know.

Why did the blonde fall down? She got shot in the head.

how do you wake up lady gaga poke her face

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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