What happens when some one breaks apart your little brother's lego tower? You have a screaming little brother and a bunch of legos all over the floor.

Knock knock. Who's there? Awkward silence Awkward silence who? ...

A blind man walks into the door of a bar

Jesus can walk on water. Babies are 75% water. I can walk on babies. I am... In jail.

A father and son are involved in a car crash. The father is killed, sadly, but the boy is rushed to the hospital. The doctor prepares for surgery, and since this boy has no family-connections to her, she performs successful surgery on him, and the boy goes home after 3-5 days.

Knock knock. Who's there? You know. You know who? "Call him Voldemort.... Fear of a name increases fear of the thing itself."

Why did the police stopped the black driver? Because one of his car's lights was busted.

Why Did the baby cross the street? He was stapled to the chicken's back

Why didn't Betty ride her bike to school? She had no legs.

Arrow to the Knee

Whats worse than contracting H.I.V.? nothing

What is worse than finding a dead mouse in your loaf of bread? A lot of things since you were able to sue the bread company for tens of thousands of dollars.

A duck walks into a bar. The bartender-"Hey we don't serve your kind here!" The duck-"What ducks?" The bartender -"No Jewish"

BUT HWY?

How do you have sex with the blue waffle? stick your penis inside

Your mama is so fat she is morbid obese.

Knock Knock Who's there? 9/11 9/11 Who? You said you'd never forget.

When Chuck Norris does a push up, he pushes himself up.

How many hispanics does it take to screw in a light bulb. One. Just one. You just screw it in, it's not that complicated.

person 1 - what's big, green and ugly? person 2 - don't know. what's big, green and ugly? person 1 - nothing is

What did he hellen keller say to her dad ? Nothing she cant talk

whats red and smells like blue paint? Hank Kovalcik

What did the furnace say to the Jew? Nothing, as it is an inanimate object and cannot communicate.

A man walks into a bar said man is escorted out of said bar said man may have died from a serious case of alcohol poisoning whilst in said bar he was escorted as dead people have trouble moving of their own accord experts discovered later that the man had actually been brutaly beaten by another man wielding a bar stool this shows that experts are not very smart

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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