Your mama is so fat she is morbid obese.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How many hispanics does it take to screw in a light bulb. One. Just one. You just screw it in, it's not that complicated.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

When Chuck Norris does a push up, he pushes himself up.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you call a boy that fell off a ferry? Extremely unlucky, since one of the other passengers noticed and the captain turned the ferry around, threw him a ladder, and pulled him aboard. Also he died of hepatitis because his mother was too poor to afford condoms, so he was born with it.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What is green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What cheese is not yours? The one that you didn't buy.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What is white, and hurts when it falls from a tree? -tom

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Knock Knock Who's there? me oh

thumb_up thumb_down

Hi

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Jesus

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why don't women wear watches? In the technologically advanced age that we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

An English man a Scotts man and an Irish man buy a helicopter between them,they go to pick it up after paying for it and realise that non of them can fly it. so they get a refund and go to the pub.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did the young girl get for Christmas? Violently raped and murdered by her abusive father.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the kitten die? Because your mom is gay.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

a young mother calf named near reality was milking itself and selling it at pathmark everyday for high prices he got a lot of money out of it and bought a big mansion where he also had a farm and collected prize show cows to show off to all of his cow friends.... he also bought gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons of prize show cow milk to drink to and build up energy for the cow show race coming up in the near fall. Every sunset he buys loads of milk to drink and feed his plants with. He plants lots of grass every day to eat and produce high quality milk goods. He was a wii, ps3, and xbox360 to play everyday and excercise his udder milk.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

A black guy, a Mexican guy and a Jew walk into a hospital. They are all undergoing the same chemotherapy treatment.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Roses are red violets are blue ... Aww I just don't give a damn and nether do you.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

what is darker than black?... YOU

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Why wasn't the 7 year old boy happy? I shot him

thumb_up thumb_down -96

Knock knock. Who's there? Awkward silence Awkward silence who? ...

thumb_up thumb_down -112

What did the nurse say to the doctor? Boo-hoo, i was pranked over the phone, i'm gonna kill myself now.

thumb_up thumb_down -140

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops