ur gay

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Who invented apple? God

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I'm on the seafood diet. A large proportion of my daily food intake is fish.

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Why did my toaster break? because it was made in china

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What happens after Madeline McCann disappears. Jokes.

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Real Joke: The US Air Force operates Seymour Johnson Air Force Base. It is named for a seaman. Go look it up.

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Cheetahs run at an alarmingly fast rate for short periods of time. Until I shoot them with harpoons.

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Are you made out of silicon, because you are silly and your name is Con.

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A mormon walks into a bar.

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Hitler: A jew walked into a bar... jokes, it was a gas chamber

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So a platypus walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then goes home drunk. His wife doesn't approve of his drinking, so she took her children then left. The lonely platypus wandered around for days on end in the lonely silence. He realized he wanted a job, but he couldn't get one, and i lied. it wasnt a platypus. it never even haooened i wasted your time.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What's green, [ THIS BIG ] and flies around the room... A remote controlled gherkin!

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A muslim, a priest, and a raabi walk into a bar. All three of them agree that it hurt.

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go F*** yourself

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What do you call a blue chair A black person

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Knock Knock ............... No one's home.

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Why didn't the Mexican kid go to school? Because he was sick.

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How come Asian's are so clever? Their baby food is blended textbook paste.

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what do you call a man with no arms or legs? numerous abusive terms as you kickk him to death.

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How do you kill a blonde? Push her off a cliff.

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Why the bird can't fly? Because i cutt off his wings.

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Whats a frogs favorite year? 2009!

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What's the difference between Jews and Germans? Jews are allowed to have an opinion about the Holocaust and hoot and holler and threaten anyone who has a different opinion than they. The sad, anti-joke part of this is that most morons will actually support this tyrannical bullying behavior. Also, special taxes against Germans that they're not allowed to have a problem with. I guess slavery is okay if you're White.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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