how do you confuse a blonde? ask if she wants a cake...then rape her

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A blonde went to a hair dresser's one day, listening to a walkman. The hair dresser asked her what she wanted, and the blonde replied, "I need to get my hair trimmed, just make sure that you do not take these headphones off." The woman looked at the blonde, surprised, but did as she was told. While she was brushing the blonde's hair, she accidentally bumped the headphones, knocking them to the ground. As she bent down to pick them up, the blonde fell over, onto the floor. The hair dresser was very confused. She picked up the head phones and listened. This is what she heard..."breath in...breath out...breath in...breath out..."!

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A dog walks into a bar, the dog is assisting his blind owner

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You know your in deep shit when you hit somebody in the head with a 2 by 4 and they dont go down.

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Your at a racism seminar. You learn not to call black people the n word but you know they really deserve it

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i like going to public parks and watching the kids run and yell because they dont know im using blanks

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what do you call a seagull that flies over the bay? -a seagull

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How I Met Your Mother, starring Oedipus Rex

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WILLY

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A Russian Irish and American beat up on a Canadian. the only thing wrong with that is i forgot the , in between the races. but on the good side the Canadian was Justin Bieber

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Q: How many different Pokèmon are there? A: Pokèmon aren't real.

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What goes up but never comes down? This dick

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Why was the homeless man homeless? He lost his house in a terrible house fire, stretching throughout his apartment building, losing his much beloved wife and kids in the horrific accident.

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One man said to another, "Hey, can you hear that?" "No." He replied.

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Whats green and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm only 13 so if you have sex with me it's illegal.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he was trying to kill himself in the fastest and easiest way due to his drinking problems, which in the first place separated him him from his wife, who is fighting with him in court for custody of there only child ,Steven. He can not even pay the rent on his apartment or hold a job to pay child support..he is also in debt.

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Dog walks into a bar Asked for a hard cider Got it

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why didn't the boy go to school because he died last night

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if you have a name/nickname/brand/version or number, please like this anti joke

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What do you call a police officer who kills a black person? Innocent

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Ich bin nicht der Anführer

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A guy comes home from work every day to his wife, who always seems miserable. He decides that her unhappiness is making him unhappy aswell, so he sits her down to talk things over. It turns out she is depressed because she can't get a job and the back wheels of her wheelchair are rusting.

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Why was the plumber sad? Because his whole family died in a plane crash.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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