Why isnt Gemma a Surfboarder? .. Because She was a Stillborn. Why isn't Kate a Ballerina? Because She's paralysed. Why isnt Tommy an Olympic High Jumper? Because He's a dwarf.

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Why couldn't the dead man take a shit? He was severely constipated

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do you know what happened to the bravest warrior in the battle who got stabbed in the foot while trying to rescue puppies from a burning building and dying children? well he took the children and puppies home, and ate them. then the SWAT came in and killed him. so yeah... oh... suck my a s s barf

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Q:Whats worse than stubbing your toe? A: Watching a terrorist saw your dads arm off.

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Moderately entertaining story, friend.

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did you know helen keller had a swingset? neither did she

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What did Santa call the prostitute? Nothing. Santa isn't real.

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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Women's Rights.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a dog in your apple

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I know a black person. His name is Mikey.

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How do you make a black man cry? Stab his wife.

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So a guy walks into a bar.... he gets a few drinks pays his bill and goes home

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What do you get when you put a blue bucket in the red sea? it gets wet

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a dyslexic made a dessert. it was a bit dry.

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Yo mama so ugly everybody died. The End.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red-head are trapped on a desert island together After many days without food, they resort to cannibalism. The blonde eats the brunette, and the red-head eats the blonde. The red-head eventually dies once the water supply runs out.

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A wood chuck could chuck as much wood as a wood chuck would if a wood chuck could chuck wood.

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What's Mackaulay Culkin's favorite salad dressing? Neverland Ranch.

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What do you call a Mentally Challenged Black Man? Whatever Name his parent(s) Gave him at birth.

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Q: whats the difference between 3 asain people 3 black people and 3 mexican prople?? A: there all different nationality

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''Levi Johnston is running for mayor of Wasilla, Alaska. Ironically, many of the babies he'll kiss on the campaign trail will be his own.''

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Remember IRON MAN 3! Subscribe to www.prettypleasehelpmeforgethatpieceofshitmovie.com

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When Geese fly in their 'V' formation, why is one line bigger than the other? There's more geese in that line.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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