A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

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you say "ask me if im a tree" he says "r u a tree?" you say"no..." then just stare at them

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A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

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The Holocaust

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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What's worse than a black President... George W Bush

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Why was little timmy's arm crooked His mom tried to pull his arm off.

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If Barbie is so popular...why do you have to buy her friends?

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Want to hear a joke? Me to...

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Wat do you do when you see aomeone bleeding on the ground? Walk away and act like nothing happened

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What's the difference between a prostitute and a cherry red Ferrari? A cherry red Ferrari isn't in my garage.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

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Why don't Polish girls swim in the sea? The only sea that Poland borders on is the Baltic. Throughout most of the year this sea is too cold to comfortably swim in.

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roses are grey, violets are grey, i'm colourblind and shit at poetry

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Why did the girl say 'baa'? Because she was a lamb.

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What is worse than finding a dead mouse in your loaf of bread? A lot of things since you were able to sue the bread company for tens of thousands of dollars.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was recently released from prison for violent crimes.

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The white guy did it!

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Why does an Irish cop wear a belt? To hold up his pants.

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I used to be an Adventurer like you... But then I decided that it was a dangerous form of employment and stopped.

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pedophile

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There was an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman... They all died in a horrible train wreck.

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What is white, and hurts when it falls from a tree? -tom

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A man walks into a bar with a couple of chickens by his side. He sees a man sitting at the bar drinking a beer. The man who's drinking the beer offers the other man a seat, and asks him to join him in the drinking. The other man hardly refuses and takes the glass from the other man and throws it on the with all his power to the floor. The man sitting at the bar asks him why he did it. The man answers: "My chickens don't like beer"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops