Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

How do you make a man sit down? Hold him at gunpoint.

What did the grass say to the human "Hey" The human then screams and runs to safety

What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

The meme walks out of the bar.

Q. Did you hear about the kid napping? A. Yeah, he woke up and was grumpy

A duck walks into a bar. The bartender-"Hey we don't serve your kind here!" The duck-"What ducks?" The bartender -"No Jewish"

whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff

I bought a DVD called "the 18 holes of Tiger Woods". It was a fascinating incite into the golfing technique of arguably one of the greatest sportsmen of all time.

Your mama is so fat she is morbid obese.

The pope and three young boys get into a cab. The pope tells the driver to take the boys home.

What do snowmen eat for lunch? Snowmen don't eat, they're inanimate balls of of solid precipitation with rocks for smiles and eyes and carrots for noses.

Why coulden't the fish swim? He got poked in the eye with my nipple. My nipples get really big when I'm swimming in cold water.

How much does a polar bear weigh? Around a thousand pounds.

Why did the fireman wear suspenders? To keep his pants up.

How did the cat die? I just it nine times

You walk in to your room. 7 chickens on your bed.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

Why did the boy cry? Because he was mercilessly beaten by his mother.

Why do people discriminate against black people? Because they show an undeserving amount of disrespect towards the rest of the world and why should they get anything better than what they offer.

Knock Knock Who's There? I am. I am who? I think someone has contracted amnesia.

Your carpol will be here soon! What a pool for cars is coming?

what did the mexican firefighter name his two sons. Ryan and Mike.......

What did the young girl get for Christmas? Violently raped and murdered by her abusive father.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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