What is worse than finding a dead bug in your coffee? September 11, 2001

Why did the shark eat the girl? Because she was ugly

What is red and has wheels? Grass, I lied about it being red and having wheels.

A group of 8 paintbal professionals land on an island to battle another paintball team. The team is then faced by a challeng of the other team ambushing them. Everyone is okay and not touched. A case breaks the window of the bus they hide in. They open the case and find a bullet proof vest. A man placed the vest on himself. They made it one by one out of the bus and to the otherside of the field the man with the vest was shot and started going... eghegeheghdjrhherbehgh and they pulled out a real gun bulet. They were now under attack by an enemy with real amunation. Then next man to run across the fied was killed. Tehy ran fr their lives.

whats worse than one bee sting? two bee stings whats worse than two bee stings? the halocaust whats worse than the halocaust? three bee stings

What did one Platypus say to the other Platypus? Nothing, Platypuses can't talk. However, they are the only mammal to lay eggs.

What happens when you walk around with a kick me sign on your back? you get punched in the face. How are you supposed to know it says kick, you cant see your own back.

Whats the Difference between a corvette and a pile of dead babies? A Pile of dead babies is basically useless

What is worst than 1 baby dead in a microwave? 2 babies dead in the same microwave !

Pooring urine into your eyes, is a natural way to cure pink eye. Found this out this morning.

A man is talking with his friend when suddenly he picks up a banana. He starts talking with the banana, and after a while of conversing the man sadly puts down his banana and says to his friend, "I'm sorry but your son has just died in a horrible accident."

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called anti joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

What did the rabbit buy the Jewish duck for Hanukkah? Nothing, animals don't celebrate holidays.

whats worse than a dog biting you? two dogs biting you whats worse than that? the Holocaust whats worse than that three dog bites and one of them happens to have rabies

Q:Whats Brown and sticky? A:Maple Syrup

bob said "Hi Joe why the long face" Joe replies "I'm a horse dip sh*t"

A blind duck walks under a coffee table. Luckily, it was shorter that the table, walked underneath, and continued unharmed. Then it was eaten by a cat it couldn't see.

Why do mexicans like tacos? Because tacos are a very well liked food and they happen to taste good

what do you call a dead arab? a suicide bomber

What do you call a black man that steal from your shop? A thief

A horse finds himself sleeping in the ocean. Immediately, he decides to be a dolphin.

Suddenly a wild bunny appears ::::::::::::(:oI)

Roses are red violets are blue I'm black give me money

Your d is so small that when you had a boner and walked into the wall....... YOU BROKE YOUR NOSE! Millimeter Monster bro

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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