Who invented apple? God

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What do you call an asian that is black? Please tell me, I was asking a question.

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that awkward moment when your teachers a duck

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Why did the boy throw the clock out the window? He was tired of working for the man.

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The probability of someone watching you is proportional to the stupidity of your action

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- Knock Knock - Who is it ? - I'm a Jehovah witness - Sorry, I don't know anyone by the name of "a Jehovah witness". Bye.

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Q: What did the police officer do when he saw another man getting assaulted. A: Went into a corner and started fapping to it.

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Why is the beach always so angry? The beach is just sand and waves and lacks sentience, but makes up for it in crabs.

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What did the plane say to the ground when they hit each other Boom

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Why did the man have no head? It was blown off in Iraq 2 and days ago

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Sorry I am like so fucking wasted still, I keep giggling and laughing all of the time.

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What did Hitler say to the black jew? Get to the back of the oven

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Build a man a fire and he will be warm for a night, set a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

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Roses are red but violets arent blue!!!!!

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When god hands you lemons .. you find a new god.

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why did the man get a divorce? Because his wife had an affair.

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Why was little Timmy so fast? Because he's tied up in the trunk of a speeding car.

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how do you wake up lady gaga? set her alarm for a reasonable hour

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My girlfriend gave me her first ever blowjob last night. I came in her mouth and she washed it down with a can of Carling. Obviously she had to get that horrible taste out of her mouth, so she gave me another blowjob.

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Little Jack Horner sat in a corner eating a Christmas pie. He died the next morning because it was Easter and the pie had remained unrefrigerated since the holidays. His parents were brought up on charges of neglegent homocide. Plus, they had a meth lab in the guest bathroom and ran a prostituion ring off of Craig's list. Jack's sister is now in the care of loving foster parents,who plan on adopting her and she misses her brother. Easter is a sad reminder of her former life, even though she is now a devout Christian and acknowledges the day as that of our Lord's ressurection. She plans on going to college to study nursing, someday.

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A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have multiple personality disorder And so do we

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why did the boy drop the ball. he was shot in the head.

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whats white and big and white? alot of things...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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