A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are running from the police. The brunette and the redhead escape, but the blonde is captured. Why? Because she had a prosthetic leg sustained from a previous injury, and thus couldn't run very fast.

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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what's the difference between natives and dogs? people enjoy having dogs in their houses

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Q. Did you hear about the kid napping? A. Yeah, he woke up and was grumpy

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Why did Michael Jackson ask a Best Buy clerk for the best 3D TV? He didn't ... He's dead.

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"Ask me if I'm a tree." "Are you a tree?" "No."

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A man walks around a bar.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing set? She had no arms.

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A black kid, an Asian kid, and a Jewish kid walk into a barrier. They are students at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry and they walk straight through the barrier onto Platform 9 3/4.

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Q: what is more sad than being alone A: being alone with lots of cats

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A Priest and a Rabbi walk into a grocery store. As they walk past the meat section, the Priest stops, smiles, and turns to the Rabbi. "Feeling Hungry?" The Rabbi reaches down and picks up a pack of Koscher hotdogs.

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I'm gonna put my nut-sack on your drum set

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Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says its getting hot in here the other muffin say holy shit a talking muffin.

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What's the difference between a red cube and a green cube? Nothing, I'm color blind.

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what do you call a homosexual kid? A Kerich

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Knock Knock Who's There? Boo Boo Who? Boo Smith, I'm the town rapist.

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A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

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what did the Spanish priest say to the Ukranian gynocologist? *fart*

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

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wats worse than gettin bitched at by ur mom? gettin raped by a giant scorpian n getting SUPER ULTRA MEGA AIDS

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What is the worst part about being a black Jew? Having to sit at the back of the gas chamber.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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What do you call a group of black men jumping off a building? Chocolate Rain

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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