how to u kill a baby with no arms, throw it in a pool

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? 1. Discovering your "girlfriend" is a man 2. The Holocaust 3. Being Raped 4. Being Raped by a Giant Scorpion-Panda Hybrid 5. Being Raped by a Giant Scorpion-Panda Hybrid who doesn't wear protection.

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How do you occupy a blonde for hours ? Give her a long list of stuff to do.

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acuna

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Susie is 14 & she never listens to her mom, why is that? She's deaf.

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Roses are red Violets are purple I just got raped by a clown

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What's worse than a black President... George W Bush

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What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A pilot

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lebron

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What's the difference between an orange? Mooses don't like to wear sweater-vests.

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A nun, a jew, and a KKK member are all stuck together in a lifeboat. A large wave overturns the boat and they all drown.

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Q. Did you hear about the kid napping? A. Yeah, he woke up and was grumpy

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Women's rights.

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If you helped Jack on the horse, would you help Jack off the horse? Of course; if he was too short to climb onto the saddle then it would be irresponsible and potentially dangerous not to help him off. As his riding instructor, you would be liable for any injuries Jack sustained had he attempted to dismount the horse with no assistance.

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Yo mama is so fat that her dietician often recommends that she decrease her calorie intake and exercise more often to avoid risk of diabetes or potentially a stroke.

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Why don't Polish girls swim in the sea? The only sea that Poland borders on is the Baltic. Throughout most of the year this sea is too cold to comfortably swim in.

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YouTube comment: If I get a cent for every pixel on the screen. I would have... $960 for a 224p video $2049.6 240p video $1296 for a 270p video $2304 for a 360p video $4099.2 for a 480p video $9984 for a 520p video $9216 for a 720p video $20736 for a 1080p video $125829.12 for a 2304p video ... I would be RICH!!

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what was the dinosaur after it got out of the pool? wet

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What is green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

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I went to the store and I fell

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what does a jew want most for hanukkah? presents

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Why did the fireman wear suspenders? To keep his pants up.

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Knock Knock Who's there? me oh

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Why did the vegetarian only work one day? Because her co-workers are cannibals.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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