How fast is the speed of sex? 70 mph, minimum 40 mph

What's purple and has four legs? I don't know. What? I DONT KNOW EITHER THAT'S WHY I'M ASKING YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE!

My Roomate-(crying in the fetal position for the love of his life has been murderer) Me- (laughing) I have a problem

Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange. Aren't You Glad I Didn't Say Cliterus?

How do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

A father and son are involved in a car crash. The father is killed, sadly, but the boy is rushed to the hospital. The doctor prepares for surgery, and since this boy has no family-connections to her, she performs successful surgery on him, and the boy goes home after 3-5 days.

A wolf boards a plane with two dead rabbits in his mouth. The flight attendant approaches him and says, "Sir, you can only have one of those on the plane." The wolf bites her throat out.

Your mom smells so bad that she proceeded to take a shower and then didnt smell bad at all.

Why'd the cat have one eye? It got kicked by a goat.

What's the difference between a duck?

What do you call a black guy eating fried chicken? His name.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I got a terminal disease and I'm going to die in six months. Mom if you're reading this I love you. Take good care of Joey.

Why did Michael Jackson ask a Best Buy clerk for the best 3D TV? He didn't ... He's dead.

What is black and white and red all over? A zebra that has been shot, because poaching is quite common in many African savannas.

What did the African boy get for his Christmas present for the first time? Leprosy

What do you call a black man on the side of the road? -A black man who needs a ride.

How did the square become a circle? Due to the period of recession in our nation, it was found necessary to cut corners.

I'm gonna put my nut-sack on your drum set

Why did the one pound coin cross the road? It was stuck up the chickens ass

What did Tarzan say when he took out his knife? I took out my knife.

What black and blue and red all over? My mom after my dad comes back from the bar.

A cow walks into a bar and says, "moo."

Knock Knock Who's there? me oh

Two blondes are walking down the street. One breaks her left high heel and the other is called Monica.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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