Why did the chess grandmaster lose his mind? Because he died of old age.

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A black guy, a Mexican guy and a Jew walk into a hospital. They are all undergoing the same chemotherapy treatment.

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Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Give a man a gun and he'll build you a refrigerator.

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Ask me how old my cat is. How old's your cat? I don't know.

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What's pink and smells like chicken? A pink hair band, I was lying about the chicken part.

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What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

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what do you call skiediving? a very fun but moderatly dangerouse sport that many people have fun doing from the ages of 19 to 31

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Why can't Michael Jackson drive? Because he's dead.

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2 ducks walk into a bar. The first orders a drink, drinks it, and drops dead. The other duck said, "Bar tender! What did you put in my friends drink?" The bar tender said, "Poison."

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Why did the hipster hate black people? Because he was racist.

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why did the chicken cross the road ??? why would you care??

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What's worse than being gay? Dying in a gas chamber in the Holocaust.

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's the postman, I have a package you need to sign for.

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What do you get when you cross a rhino and an elephant? Two angry pachyderms.

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What's 8 inches long and makes my girlfriend cry when I put it in her mouth? Her miscarriage

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Q: What is hard and long on a man? A: His wife's funeral

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what did the little girl do after drinking a smoothie? she choked and died a painful death.

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Q: why did Helen Keller's dog kill himself? A: Because he couldn't stand to see his owner suffer through blindness and deafness and being the butt of hundreds of offensive and hurtful jokes.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Around a thousand pounds.

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Why did the cow cross the road? To get to the slaughter house

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Q: what is more sad than being alone A: being alone with lots of cats

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Why did the rose look so brown? Because it was dead

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Why was the boy sad? His friend stabbed him with a fork. Also, his mother died. Also, his dad raped him Also, he has a chode. And it really sucks when you have a chode.

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who did the strait guy marry? a woman

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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