Why did the boy go swimming in the ocean? He didn't. the current pulled him in and he drowned.

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What do the Holocaust and baseball have in common? They are sports, except the Holocaust.

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What did the sphinx say to the Minotaur? Nothing, as they are fictional creatures and in according to probable science, don't not exist.

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What did the muffin say to the other muffin? "Hello, nice to meet you."

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A rhinoceros walks into a bar. As it felt threatened by the presence of many humans, the rhino attacks and kills several people with the big horn on its nose.

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Hey Tim lets think of a joke

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Ham and Cheese!

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Why did the kitten die? Because your mom is gay.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I have a gun BANG!

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My dog has no nose." "How does it smell?" "Potato"

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What's worse than women's rights? Actually, not much, because women throughout history suffered for too long the hardships of over dominant male figures and deserve the freedoms they have achieved today.

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How fast is the speed of sex? 70 mph, minimum 40 mph

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I just lost the game where if you think about the game then you lose the game. so did you.

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What's 6 inches long, held in your hand, and has a round tip? A pencil you pervert.

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What's the difference between a prostitute and a cherry red Ferrari? A cherry red Ferrari isn't in my garage.

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A kitten walks into a bar and orders a saucer of milk. Everyone enjoys the novelty of his presence.

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A man walked into a bar and said ow.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know why, but I was standing on the other side of the road and I took it home and mamed the chicken with a powerdrill.

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Jesus Christ walks into a bar and the bartender says "Holy crap it's Jesus!" and everyone quickly updates their Facebooks.

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What happens when you throw a cricket bat at a blonde? She is hurt and reports you to the police for anti-social behaviour.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? John. Oh, hey! Come in.

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The NBA lockout

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What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Being cut in half by a human while you were trying to eat an apple

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What's worse than one bee sting? 2 bee stings

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops