Two muffins are in an oven. One says "It's getting hot in here". The other one starts to reply but then it's internal organs burst from the heat.

Hey Tim lets think of a joke

There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

Why shouldnt you throw rocks at a black kid on a bike? Because the kid wasn't riding in your way, you could get arrested for assault and battery, and he probably lives in a low income area and cant afford health insurance if he was injured.

what is brown with wheels? a potatoe, i was just kidding about the wheels

What do you get when you cross a pelican with a mountain goat? It's hard to say.

What did one man say to the other? I'm a Mormon.

There was a Priest, a Rabbi, and a Gay Man on a plane. The plane was going down. The Priest said "amen". The Rabbi said "amein". The Gay Man put his penis in the rabbi's asshole.

Susie is 14 & she never listens to her mom, why is that? She's deaf.

I've got a boner

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

What kind of animal eats and pisses on everything? Your mother. -Avery Vartanian

A kitten walks into a bar and orders a saucer of milk. Everyone enjoys the novelty of his presence.

did you hear the one about the boyscout and his scoutmaster? They had a lovely relationship, and both went on to be role models.

Chuck Norris was walking down the street when he was confronted by an armed, very desperate street robber. Chuck unfortunately made the decision to defend himself, and was shot in the gut before he could complete a roundhouse kick. The robber then took his wallet and ran off, undoubtedly to buy drugs.

what's the difference between a duck? one leg is the same.

What do you call a woman with a penis? A Hermaphrodite.

hey, can you answer a question for me? yeah, sure. ThankYou!

Roses are red, Muslims are brown, When I see them swimming, I hope that they drown!

Q. What's silver and cries? A. Someone who's been stabbed while wearing a suit of armour.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

what has two legs, and is red? half a cat.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape the overwhelming feeling of self doubt created by an abusive drug addicted father which has left him seeking life threatening situations that should never befall a simple chicken.

A black man and a hispanic man are riding in a car. Who's driving? The hispanic man

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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