A blonde walks into a library. "PLEASE CAN I HAVE A CHEESEBURGER?!" he shouts at the top of his lungs. "Sir, this is a library," the librarian says. "Oh, sorry," he whispers and goes to McDonald's Two years of the routine and he dies of of heart failure and has diabetes.

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A man walks into a bar said man is escorted out of said bar said man may have died from a serious case of alcohol poisoning whilst in said bar he was escorted as dead people have trouble moving of their own accord experts discovered later that the man had actually been brutaly beaten by another man wielding a bar stool this shows that experts are not very smart

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why does breanna love pie? BECAUSE ITS JIMMYS LAST NAME!!!

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Richard fell off of a cliff. He can fly.

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What's green and has wheels? A cucumber with wheels.

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Why did Sally fall of the Swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Sally

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? 1. Discovering your "girlfriend" is a man 2. The Holocaust 3. Being Raped 4. Being Raped by a Giant Scorpion-Panda Hybrid 5. Being Raped by a Giant Scorpion-Panda Hybrid who doesn't wear protection.

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Why was the globe sad? Because it was cut in half.

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What's white and sticky? A white stick.

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Knock Knock Who's there? me oh

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Why did the girl buy wine? She was hosting a party for four of her closest friends.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Butter. Butter who? Oh, um, sorry i forgot the rest...

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My Roomate-(crying in the fetal position for the love of his life has been murderer) Me- (laughing) I have a problem

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What's black, white,and red all over? A crime scene where a black and white man were brutally murdered by a psychopath that is still on the loose and could be killing someone else.

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Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange. Aren't You Glad I Didn't Say Cliterus?

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a jew throwing a dime into a wishing well.

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What's the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? The wheelchair

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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A wolf boards a plane with two dead rabbits in his mouth. The flight attendant approaches him and says, "Sir, you can only have one of those on the plane." The wolf bites her throat out.

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Q: What's the difference between an African American and a bench? A: An African American is a human being of black dissent, while a bench is an inanimate object that people sit on.

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Why was the man sad after mowing is lawn? He ran over his dog.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

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What did the peach say to the apple? Nothing. Peaches can't talk.

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My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well, I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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