Your mother is so dumb. It's a good thing she knows sign language.

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How can you kill a blonde? Hack her to bits.

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Want to hear a joke about Potassium? So do I.

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What do you call a black person who drives a plane? A pilot.

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a horse walks in to a bar and the bar tender asks, "why the long face?" The horse doesn't respond because it is a horse and is confused by its surroundings and then gallops out of the bar knocking over a few tables as it makes its escape.

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Cancer victim: What kind of doctor are you? Person 2: I'm not a doctor. In fact, I'm a suicide bomber and am planning to initiate the detonation sequence right now. Cancer victim: Well, it doesn't really matter. No matter who shows up, I'll still die anyways. This way, I'll be able to pay a visit to the transcendent city high in the heavens sooner. Person 2: I bet that many would mourn your death at your remembrance ceremony. Cancer victim: That doesn't bother me. My friends and family are close to my heart, but that doesn't warrant eternal proximity with one another in itself. Person 2: Let's go to a better place. Let us finally break free of our mortal chains that have unceasingly been hindering our progress since the first war took place. Cancer victim: Wait, I've changed my mind! Person 2: Too late. I wish I had a time machine... not.

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a man walks into a bar he is an alcohol and it's ruining his family

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What do you call a donkey walking backwards a confused donkey

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a little boy told his friend he failed a test.. the friend replied that his parents r goin to kill him... to save himself the suffering ...the boy hung himself in his closet

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Haikus are awesome, but sometimes they dont make sense. Refrigerator.

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"What's 'green', 'blue', and 'red' all over?" My color-blind friend said in confusion.

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whats the main reason Mexicans have legs? so they can stand.

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Why did the woman keep getting sexually harassed while calling for her lost dog? Her dog is named "Ilovedicks."

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So a baby seal walks into a club.

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What's purple and has four legs? I don't know. What? I DONT KNOW EITHER THAT'S WHY I'M ASKING YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE!

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Knock knock. Who's there? Awkward silence Awkward silence who? ...

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How's your mum? she's dead..

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A man walks into a bar He says ouch

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Your mom smells so bad that she proceeded to take a shower and then didnt smell bad at all.

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A priest and a bunch of boys are in a room. They are having choir practice.

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Why'd the cat have one eye? It got kicked by a goat.

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Knock, Knock The door's open

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Q:How many doorknobs should you throw at a police man? A:None you should have upmost respect for the law.

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What did the man say to the attractive female bartender as he left the bar? Well, it's been fun but I hate you so I'm leaving to kill your entire family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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