A man walked into a bar and said ow.

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17

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Two black guys walk into a country club and ask to play a round of golf. They are turned away because the aren't members of the club.

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What cheese is not yours? The one that you didn't buy.

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Q:Ask me my name. A:What is your name? A:Hey why do you need to know that?

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs on your porch? Matt.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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Yo mammas so fat she went on a diet.

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It's raining, it's pouring The old man is snoring He went to bed, he bumped his head Got a brain hemorrhage and died in his sleep.

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why does king kong so fat? because he eats to much

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whats white and smells like black paint? nothing, white paint even though it is still paint has a slightly different smell due to the difference in dye colors used to make it

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Your momma's so ugly she adopted you because she had a problem attracting men.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the middle of the oceon? Dead in the water.

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Why did the chiken cross the road. Anwer: because it was being chased by a crazy horny/ kinky redneck.

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What couldn't the stereotypical pirate get into the movie? Well, considering that the stereotypical pirate existed in the sixteenth to eightteenth centuries and the first motion picture wasn't made until the mid to late nineteenth century, also the technology for time travel does not exist nor has it ever, I would have to derive that he was not let in due to the fact that there was no way for him to ever exist at the same time that a movie would have been playing.

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26.5% of Americans are obese.

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What happens when a japanese boy goes into a planet called Zypharecion which is 2000 light years away with 20% oxygen and 78% nitrogen and 2% of other earthly air elements and heats up a balloon enough that it explodes? He wont be at that planet because it does not exist and travelling at the speed of light has not been proven possible for humans.

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what did the girl trapped in the fire say? help

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What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A pilot

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roses are grey, violets are grey, i'm colourblind and shit at poetry

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What's black and not working? An old, broken piano.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sexual offender.

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Q: What is hard and long on a man? A: His wife's funeral

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what is not funny? This joke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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