- Anti Joke

What do you call a man who has reached the highest level of prestige in all Call of Duty games? A Virgin

Knock knock, "Whos there" a business man who wants to sell you things that you don't need "Oh, go away"

Why did Lisa fall of the swing? Cause she had no arms... A: Knock Knock B: Whos there? A: Definitely not Lisa....

Q: Why didn't the man give money to the homeless person on the sidewalk? A: Because he thought that he was faking it. Two days later the homeless person died in an alleyway from starvation. Nobody was there to witness it, and the body was never found.

What do you call someone who copies a previously posted anti-joke without doing any research to see if it has been posted before? a lazy good for nothing rectum licking testicle sucking gonad gobbling arse bandit with narcissism issues

Guy and Jar of Chunky Peanut Butter Guy; "Hey you're chunky" Peanut Butter; "I know"

What's grey and can't swim? A Castle

An Irish man walks into a bar. The bartender looks at him and notices he has a steering wheel stuck down the front of his pants. "Hey," he says, "What's with the steering wheel down your pants?" The Irish man looks down at it, dumbfounded. "I have absolutely no idea," he says, and removes it.

Did you hear about the Dislexic Devil worshipers? They sold their soul to Santa.

When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

READ IT ALL> whats the difference between a jew and a pizza...the jew is a human with living features and organs that keep his body hydrated while also keeping his blood pumped throughout him, otherwise the pizza is a circular, doe based cake like food topped with a fine layer of cheese and in some cases topped of with other substances such as pineapple or ham :)

The opposing forces behind all human beings is not light vs darkness, not good vs evil, but fear vs ' love. Whatever is overwhelmingly good for one person, is evil to many. Overwhelming darkness wont allow you to see. Overwhelming light will make you blind. You can never fear overwhelming love. You can never love overwhelming fear. These are the true polar opposites, part of all emotion that drive the human being.

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

What do you call a man who has reached the highest level of prestige in all Call of Duty games? A Virgin

What came first the chicken or the egg? Neither, chickens have been extinct since 1987.

Why did the boy have glass in his mouth? Because he was chewing on glass.

Knock Knock WHO'S THERE?????!!! y u mad? u have been knocking at the doors for 5 hours now, mom

Why did George Bush blow up the Twin Towers on 9/11? 9/12 was his girlfriends birthday.

i did ur mom lol. thats the joke. : )

3 men walk into a bar. The 4th one ducks.

What do you call a black man who is flying a plane? A pilot.

Roses are red, Violets are violet, hence the name Violets.

A disabled man walked into a- That can't be right

What's funny and looks like a fish? A clown fish

Its behind you like if you looked behind

Knock knock, "Whos there" a business man who wants to sell you things that you don't need "Oh, go away"

Why did Lisa fall of the swing? Cause she had no arms... A: Knock Knock B: Whos there? A: Definitely not Lisa....

Q: Why didn't the man give money to the homeless person on the sidewalk? A: Because he thought that he was faking it. Two days later the homeless person died in an alleyway from starvation. Nobody was there to witness it, and the body was never found.

What do you call someone who copies a previously posted anti-joke without doing any research to see if it has been posted before? a lazy good for nothing rectum licking testicle sucking gonad gobbling arse bandit with narcissism issues

Guy and Jar of Chunky Peanut Butter Guy; "Hey you're chunky" Peanut Butter; "I know"

What's grey and can't swim? A Castle

An Irish man walks into a bar. The bartender looks at him and notices he has a steering wheel stuck down the front of his pants. "Hey," he says, "What's with the steering wheel down your pants?" The Irish man looks down at it, dumbfounded. "I have absolutely no idea," he says, and removes it.

Did you hear about the Dislexic Devil worshipers? They sold their soul to Santa.

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??

What do you call a man who has reached the highest level of prestige in all Call of Duty games? A Virgin

What came first the chicken or the egg? Neither, chickens have been extinct since 1987.

Why did the boy have glass in his mouth? Because he was chewing on glass.

Knock Knock WHO'S THERE?????!!! y u mad? u have been knocking at the doors for 5 hours now, mom

Why did George Bush blow up the Twin Towers on 9/11? 9/12 was his girlfriends birthday.

i did ur mom lol. thats the joke. : )

3 men walk into a bar. The 4th one ducks.

What do you call a black man who is flying a plane? A pilot.

Roses are red, Violets are violet, hence the name Violets.

A disabled man walked into a- That can't be right

What's funny and looks like a fish? A clown fish

Its behind you like if you looked behind

Knock knock, "Whos there" a business man who wants to sell you things that you don't need "Oh, go away"

Why did Lisa fall of the swing? Cause she had no arms... A: Knock Knock B: Whos there? A: Definitely not Lisa....

Q: Why didn't the man give money to the homeless person on the sidewalk? A: Because he thought that he was faking it. Two days later the homeless person died in an alleyway from starvation. Nobody was there to witness it, and the body was never found.

What do you call someone who copies a previously posted anti-joke without doing any research to see if it has been posted before? a lazy good for nothing rectum licking testicle sucking gonad gobbling arse bandit with narcissism issues

*Guy and Jar of Chunky Peanut Butter* Guy; "Hey you're chunky" Peanut Butter; "I know"

What's grey and can't swim? A Castle

An Irish man walks into a bar. The bartender looks at him and notices he has a steering wheel stuck down the front of his pants. "Hey," he says, "What's with the steering wheel down your pants?" The Irish man looks down at it, dumbfounded. "I have absolutely no idea," he says, and removes it.

Did you hear about the Dislexic Devil worshipers? They sold their soul to Santa.

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??

Guy and Jar of Chunky Peanut Butter Guy; "Hey you're chunky" Peanut Butter; "I know"