What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Hey, where'd my tractor go?

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To the person who wrote the dislike joke: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAH GOOD FAIL!

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yo mama so fat that she should be concerned because diabetes is a serious issue

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I love my valentine <3 Hes mine no matter what anyone says <3 Cause i love him with all my heart <3

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My Roomate-(crying in the fetal position for the love of his life has been murderer) Me- (laughing) I have a problem

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How do you fit 1,000 Jews in a Volkswagen? Trick question, you can't.

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Why didn't Tommy walk to school? 'Cause he was in a wheelchair..

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Why was the man sad after mowing is lawn? He ran over his dog.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? A warm meal thanks to a Charity organization.

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What do you a a toilet with fecal matter in it? A toilet.

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What did the duck say to the man? Nothing. Ducks cannot talk.

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Why did the Calculus teacher give an Asian student an F on a test? Because he got less than 60% of the answers correct.

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What's worse than one bee sting? 2 bee stings

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What did the man say to the attractive female bartender as he left the bar? Well, it's been fun but I hate you so I'm leaving to kill your entire family.

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My wife's star sign was cancer and it's quite ironic how she died really... She was attacked by a giant crab.

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman immediately calls the local stable to report the missing stallion, and his owner promptly arrives to take him home. He thanks the landlord and offers a small reward, but it is respectfully declined.

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Why was school cancelled? Because the school was bombed.

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Whats 9+10? 19

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer was arrested by the ASPCA and PETA for letting the chicken run free near a horribly busy road

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Knock knock

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Q: Why did the bully hit the kid A:Because he is a bully-I thought that would have been self explanitory.

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whats red and smells like blue paint? Hank Kovalcik

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A man and his family walk into a talent agent's office. The man proceeds to sexually accost his wife and children. The agent calls security who escort the family out and helps the wife find a domestic violence shelter to stay at.

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A black man and a hispanic man are riding in a car. Who's driving? The hispanic man

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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