What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Hey, where'd my tractor go?

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I love my valentine <3 Hes mine no matter what anyone says <3 Cause i love him with all my heart <3

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My Roomate-(crying in the fetal position for the love of his life has been murderer) Me- (laughing) I have a problem

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Knock knock Who's there? That that that. What makes you say that?

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Why didn't Tommy walk to school? 'Cause he was in a wheelchair..

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Why was the man sad after mowing is lawn? He ran over his dog.

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What did the duck say to the man? Nothing. Ducks cannot talk.

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Why do Jewish people like money so much? Because they can exchange it for goods and services

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Why did the Calculus teacher give an Asian student an F on a test? Because he got less than 60% of the answers correct.

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America Votes

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what is long,hard and holds semen,a submarine , i spelled seamen wrong

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Why was the asian boy get straight A's? He paid attention during class, took good notes, studied at home, and had a personal drive that lead him to be a good student.

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman immediately calls the local stable to report the missing stallion, and his owner promptly arrives to take him home. He thanks the landlord and offers a small reward, but it is respectfully declined.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer was arrested by the ASPCA and PETA for letting the chicken run free near a horribly busy road

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How can you kill a blonde? Hack her to bits.

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Whats 9+10? 19

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Knock knock

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A black, a muslim, and a communist walk into a bar, the bartender says "what will it be Mr. President?

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whats red and smells like blue paint? Hank Kovalcik

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what did the hobo do when he saw timmy get hit by the bus and drop his ice cream? stole the ice cream and laughed

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Why was the boy sad? His friend stabbed him with a fork. Also, his mother died. Also, his dad raped him Also, he has a chode. And it really sucks when you have a chode.

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A man and his family walk into a talent agent's office. The man proceeds to sexually accost his wife and children. The agent calls security who escort the family out and helps the wife find a domestic violence shelter to stay at.

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i'm a loser with body odor.. plus i play pokemon to pass the time because reality is just to horrible to face. guess who? josh wood.

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A black man and a hispanic man are riding in a car. Who's driving? The hispanic man

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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