Why did George Bush blow up the Twin Towers on 9/11? 9/12 was his girlfriends birthday.

What do you call a chicken with no feathers, no guts, and no head? Fried chicken

Why did Rudolph poop while flying over Chicago? Actually, he had to go since trip started, and that's just where it happened to land.

a red boat and a blue boat collided all the survivors still have nightmares to this day

WHAT DO YOU CALL SOMEONE HAVING A MYOCARDIAL INFARCTION? Dead

A Jew walks into an expensive Hotel and orders 500 dollars worth of wine.

Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

A woman went outside for some fresh air.

mat (telling anti joke): so you are stranded in a desert, right and kyle: no. Mat: no man i'm Kyle: no (kyle was later found dead)

whats funny about female tennage life? SELF HARM OOOOO YEAHHHH

What's taters, precious? The potato is a starchy, tuberous crop from the perennial Solanum tuberosum of the Solanaceae family.

Did you hear about the Dislexic Devil worshipers? They sold their soul to Santa.

Father Murphy met Samuel Myer on the street. Sam it's been a month o' Sundays since I've seen you. You look propserous. How's the moile business? A snip better, Father, since we talked last. And thank you. For what, Sam? Well the last time we met you asked what I did with the foreskins. Well, here is the answer, my new business. What's this, a wallet. But so smooth, Sam. Yeah, Father, but when you rub it. Rub it, Sam? Yeah when you rub it it falls apart. And you have to buy a new one! Mazel Tov!

Bitch your as two-faced as Doduo

A blonde woman with her son are in walmart , as they approach the food and beverage section , they see a mexican man looking at the eggs. The man asks for help from the blonde woman about egg quality. She says ABD Eggs are the best so the mexican guy chooses that. Upon leaving the little boy points to the mexicans guys hat and shouts "ALIENS !" the mother gets really embarassed and shouts at her son for his behaviour and says it is not right. The mum gets relieved that she say that the mexican guy could not hear since he was listening to music. Upon the way out the mum spots a purplish liquid dripping out of the mexican guys hair. She asks him and he replies "Its the hair gel". The blonde and son nods and continues on their lives. - AK

An Asian man fails a math test

What did the cancer patient get for his birthday HIV

what di the black kid get 4 x-MAS nothing

You know why one side of the "v" formation of a flock of geese is longer don't you? Cause it has more geese in it.

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger....... unless it is a nonkiller disease that makes you extremely weak :D

Pigs have the emotional capacity of a five year old think about that next time you have to dissect one in biology

What body part do you shave other than your balls? My fridge.

you mooma's like a bowling bowl i pick her up finger her throw her down the gutter and she still comes back for more

How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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