A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

GONNA

thumb_up thumb_down -7

i was molested.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Leukemia

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Roses are red, violets are blue That's a fact.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Your mother is so fat.... I am happy to see her join our exercise group.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What did the Catholic preist say to the altar boy? You've been a good altar boy.

thumb_up thumb_down -113

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -163

if a white guy, a black guy and a hispanic guy jump off a 10 story building, who hits the ground first? the man who jumped first. racist.

thumb_up thumb_down +84

What was the biggest turning point during Michael Vick's transformation from despised felon to MVP candidate? He stopped killing dogs.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

What happened to the blonde that died her hair brown? Her hair turned brown.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What did the guard say to the... I was going to finish this anti-joke but I took an arrow to the knee.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

speacking of cheese... steve jobs died

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a terrorist.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Q: What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A: Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A blonde walks into a salon and says "I would like to get my golden locks trimmed." The haircutter replies "surely, just sit yourself down in that chair over there and I'll be with you momentarily." The blonde walks to the chair and sits down. When the haircutter comes over he asks her, "would you please remove your headset, I can't cut your hair while they're on." She laughs at her forgetfulness and removes them obligingly.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Pickup Line: Hay girl is that a mirror in your pants. Becuase I can see me in it.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

An Irishman walks into a bar. He gets extremely drunk and gets hit by a train.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why can't Jay cut his hair? Because he has AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Yo momma so ugly just after she was born, her mother said, "What a treasure!" and her father said, "Yea, let's go bury it!"

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A black man and a hispanic man are riding in a car. Who's driving? The hispanic man

thumb_up thumb_down -2

you: knock knock person: who's there you: interrupting cow person: interrupting cow you:MOOOOOOOOO

thumb_up thumb_down -6

There once was an Asian kid who got a B+ in Math. He was later yelled at and beat by his parents.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How many women are in the world? a little over 3.2 billion because statistics show that there are roughly 51-52% females in the whole population of humans

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops