Roes are red, Violets are blue, This poem doesn't rhyme, You're entire family has died. The plane that they were on went down due to a flock of geese getting sucked into the engine. They were visiting you for your twenty fifth birthday and wanted to surprise you. there were no survivors.

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Q: What did the psychopath dream about? A: An insane chimpanzee kicking his head off, or maybe something normal

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? I don't know, he couldn't open the presents.

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Whats the difference between males and females? fe

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Why did sarah fall of the swing? she has no arms. Knock knock. whos there? not sarah.

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Something other than a Human Being walks into a bar. The bartender then makes a rational decision about how to handle the situation.

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What would Steve Jobs be doing if he were alive today? Dying.

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"Do you know the joke No me neither?" "No..." "Me neither..."

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8===D ~ ~ ~

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I was on Facebook today. Opened someones wall. Read "LIKE if you know someone that needs to be smacked in the face with a shovel." So I liked it and wrote my exboyfriend's name.......

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What does an Israeli gun sound like? Jew, jew, jew, jew, jew

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Do you like apples? Yes

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What do you get when you fall in love? A guy with a pin to burst your bubble.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock (who's there?) Not Sally.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Inform her that she is an illegitimate child resulting from a vicious, torturous rape and that her mother will never truly love her.

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roses ar red violets ar blue i have aids

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where did my tractor go.

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Why did the retirement home go out of business. There was a fire and all of the residents charred to death accept for a couple who escaped but were too traumatized to return to the old folks home.

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool? An ambulance.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear? The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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The opposing forces behind all human beings is not light vs darkness, not good vs evil, but fear vs ' love. Whatever is overwhelmingly good for one person, is evil to many. Overwhelming darkness wont allow you to see. Overwhelming light will make you blind. You can never fear overwhelming love. You can never love overwhelming fear. These are the true polar opposites, part of all emotion that drive the human being.

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how many Arabs and Jews can you fit on a bus? The bus in question is a 56 seater,so 56. If you cram some people in the aisles you could probably fit 65 if you didn't care about anyone's comfortability sheesh you might even for in 100 or more.

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Why did Justin Bieber break his leg? Because, like you and I, he is faced with the same challenges and dangers on a daily basis, and should all take necessary precautions in his every day life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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