How does he keep getting girls to sleep with him? Bear-traps..

Roses are red Violets are blue Lemons are yellow

Why did my ex-husband get fired from the m&m factory? He was throwing away all the W's.

Why did George Bush blow up the Twin Towers on 9/11? 9/12 was his girlfriends birthday.

What do you call a kid without any friends? A Sandy Hook survivor

Why was the boy sad? Because He had a frog stapled to his face

Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium BATMAN! Oh cemetery jokes

Nowadays, aviation is the most secure means of conveyance in the world, but paragliding is not.

What do you call an asian pilot? A pilot you racist bastard

Two men walk in to a bar. The first man says "I'll have some H20" The second man says "I'll have some H20, too." They both received glasses of water.

Why did Rudolph poop while flying over Chicago? Actually, he had to go since trip started, and that's just where it happened to land.

What do you do when you see a black man with half a head? Stop laughing and reload

Why was the little kid bullied? Because kids are goats.

Why did the baby fall down from the tree? It was dead.

I have an erection My mom!

What do you call a chicken with no feathers, no guts, and no head? Fried chicken

An Asian man fails a math test

You know why one side of the "v" formation of a flock of geese is longer don't you? Cause it has more geese in it.

what di the black kid get 4 x-MAS nothing

How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

you mooma's like a bowling bowl i pick her up finger her throw her down the gutter and she still comes back for more

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

What made the lady dance? Bandz!

How do you keep an idiot in suspense?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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