Did you hear about the kidnapping yesterday? He slept for at least 3 hours.

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What do you call a black man on the side of the road? -A black man who needs a ride.

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the Batmobile? - "Robin, get in the Batmobile"

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whats silver and cries? a coin, although it can't cry because its a coin. So it's just silver

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -.......

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women's rights

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Why was the asian boy get straight A's? He paid attention during class, took good notes, studied at home, and had a personal drive that lead him to be a good student.

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What happens when you turn back time? You get "emit."

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What's the difference between a white man and a black man? Nothing. They are both created in God's image and likeness so get your mind outta the gutter!

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scottishman walk into a gay bar. And why shoudn't they.

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Why did the boy on stilts pick up the phone? Because it was ringing.

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How do you kill a blond? You don't. If you do, you'll get reported to the cops and sent to jail.

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Why did the fat man fall faster than the skinny man? He didn't. Masses does not affect the speed of falling objects. Everything with mass and volume falls with an acceleration of 9.81m/s^2 on Earth. Therefore the greater mass of the heavier man did not affect his falling speed. Both men fell at the same speed.

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A man walks into a bar. It hurt.

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acuna

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Oh look, I've found my knife

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How fast is the speed of sex? 70 mph, minimum 40 mph

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What did the republican say to the democrat? You suck!

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A man walks into a bar He says ouch

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What did the lawyer get for Christmas? More paper work

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Why was the woman making a sandwhich in the kitchen? She was hungry.

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Q. You are driving a car. In front of you there is a camion driving at your same speed. Behind you there is a helicopter flying at your same speed at the ground level. On your left there is an ambulance driving at your same speed and on your right there is a ravine. How do you get out from this horrible situation? A. Get off the carousel.

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Why did the deaf man go to the concert? He had recently acquired a brand new hearing aid which meant that he was able to hear much better and decided that he wanted to listen to some music.

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Kid 1: "Want a Hurts Doughnut?" Kid 2: "Umm... sure." Kid 1 opens up a box of freshly baked Hurts doughnut from Hurts Bakery and gives one to kid 2

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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