what did one caterpillar say to another caterpillar? let's be butterflies

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

Q:What's the difference between a pinata and a baby? A: One I hang from a tree and beat to death and the other one is a pinata..

why didnt the chicken cross the road? he did cross the road

What's brown and sticky? a stick.

YouTube comment: If I get a cent for every pixel on the screen. I would have... $960 for a 224p video $2049.6 240p video $1296 for a 270p video $2304 for a 360p video $4099.2 for a 480p video $9984 for a 520p video $9216 for a 720p video $20736 for a 1080p video $125829.12 for a 2304p video ... I would be RICH!!

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was recently released from prison for violent crimes.

what did the little girl do after drinking a smoothie? she choked and died a painful death.

Knock knock Who's there? A friend. But I don't have any friends.

A blonde walks into a library. "PLEASE CAN I HAVE A CHEESEBURGER?!" he shouts at the top of his lungs. "Sir, this is a library," the librarian says. "Oh, sorry," he whispers and goes to McDonald's Two years of the routine and he dies of of heart failure and has diabetes.

Once there was two fish in a tank, and one said "how do you drive this thing?".

what did the hobo do when he saw timmy get hit by the bus and drop his ice cream? stole the ice cream and laughed

What do you call a black person who drives a plane? A pilot.

Why did Sally fall of the Swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Sally

Yo mammas so fat she went on a diet.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? 1. Discovering your "girlfriend" is a man 2. The Holocaust 3. Being Raped 4. Being Raped by a Giant Scorpion-Panda Hybrid 5. Being Raped by a Giant Scorpion-Panda Hybrid who doesn't wear protection.

What's white and sticky? A white stick.

what's funnier than 1 Mecican? 2 Mexicans

Your momma's so ugly she adopted you because she had a problem attracting men.

Haikus are awesome, but sometimes they dont make sense. Refrigerator.

What did the penguins get for Christmas? A hang-glider What did the polar bears get for Christmas? Death, The Holocaust, Global Warming, and all of Steven King's books.

How fast is the speed of sex? 70 mph, minimum 40 mph

A blind man walks into a bar Backs up, and walks around it.

Why'd the cat have one eye? It got kicked by a goat.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...