So a baby seal walks into a club.

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Roses are der, Violets are lube, I am dyslexic.

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Ow, there's an arrow in my knee!

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? 1. Discovering your "girlfriend" is a man 2. The Holocaust 3. Being Raped 4. Being Raped by a Giant Scorpion-Panda Hybrid 5. Being Raped by a Giant Scorpion-Panda Hybrid who doesn't wear protection.

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Why was the globe sad? Because it was cut in half.

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why does king kong so fat? because he eats to much

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Why are atheists stupid? Actually, statistically, they are more intelligent than believers.

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Q:What are black basketball players good at? A:Running,shooting and stealing.

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what do you call a man with no arms and no legs? Bob

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why does crazy george spin a ball on his fingers well? because he has a huge dingo

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Why don't women wear watches? In the technologically advanced age that we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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Roses are red It's 4 in the morning I have full blown aids I'm going to bed now, this is boring

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Why was little timmy's arm crooked His mom tried to pull his arm off.

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What happens when a japanese boy goes into a planet called Zypharecion which is 2000 light years away with 20% oxygen and 78% nitrogen and 2% of other earthly air elements and heats up a balloon enough that it explodes? He wont be at that planet because it does not exist and travelling at the speed of light has not been proven possible for humans.

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yo mama so fat that she should be concerned because diabetes is a serious issue

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A quadrapeldgic walks no where

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why do holocasut jokes make us laugh? i dont know you tell me

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a young mother calf named near reality was milking itself and selling it at pathmark everyday for high prices he got a lot of money out of it and bought a big mansion where he also had a farm and collected prize show cows to show off to all of his cow friends.... he also bought gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons of prize show cow milk to drink to and build up energy for the cow show race coming up in the near fall. Every sunset he buys loads of milk to drink and feed his plants with. He plants lots of grass every day to eat and produce high quality milk goods. He was a wii, ps3, and xbox360 to play everyday and excercise his udder milk.

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what has green paint and flies? a garbage truck

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A Woman out of the kitchen

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what did one caterpillar say to another caterpillar? let's be butterflies

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Butter. Butter who? Oh, um, sorry i forgot the rest...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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