Two muffins are in an oven. They are then baked at 375 for about 30 minutes and then taken out to cool.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What would George Washington do if he was alive today? Scream and scrach at the top of his coffin.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Your mama's so fat, she gets confused with Santa Claus.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's black and blue and red all over? A person who was just in a fight.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why was timmy crying? He gave his grandmother AIDs...

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why wouldnt NASA send a blackman into space without a space suit? Because space is a vacuum there is no air no atmosphere the tempurature is almost zero kelvin so if you ever go out int space please dont take off your helmet out there because you would freeze to death almost instantaniously.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why are atheists stupid? Actually, statistically, they are more intelligent than believers.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the vegetarian only work one day? Because her co-workers are cannibals.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Two blondes are walking down the street. One breaks her left high heel and the other is called Monica.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

whats white and smells like black paint? nothing, white paint even though it is still paint has a slightly different smell due to the difference in dye colors used to make it

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's funnier than House? Family Guy.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

An old man gets into a van with two little boys. They are his grandsons.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What's worse than a black President... George W Bush

thumb_up thumb_down -25

a young mother calf named near reality was milking itself and selling it at pathmark everyday for high prices he got a lot of money out of it and bought a big mansion where he also had a farm and collected prize show cows to show off to all of his cow friends.... he also bought gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons of prize show cow milk to drink to and build up energy for the cow show race coming up in the near fall. Every sunset he buys loads of milk to drink and feed his plants with. He plants lots of grass every day to eat and produce high quality milk goods. He was a wii, ps3, and xbox360 to play everyday and excercise his udder milk.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Q. Why do Puerto Ricans throw their trash away in clear plastic bags? A. So Italians can go window shopping.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Q: What do you call an aligator in a vest A: Investigator

thumb_up thumb_down -41

What did the nurse say to the doctor? Boo-hoo, i was pranked over the phone, i'm gonna kill myself now.

thumb_up thumb_down -141

What did the phone say to the telephone? I can't connect with you.

thumb_up thumb_down -157

Why did the deaf man go to the concert? He had recently acquired a brand new hearing aid which meant that he was able to hear much better and decided that he wanted to listen to some music.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

What did the guard say to the... I was going to finish this anti-joke but I took an arrow to the knee.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Why didn't little jimmy get anything for Christmas? He is Jewish.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

John had 32 candy bars. He ate 28 of them. What does John have now? daibetes, john has diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

what is not funny? This joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why does Jonny have a phobia birds? Because he has one glued to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops