What did the boy do when he was cold? He got a blanket.

What happens when you throw a cricket bat at a blonde? She is hurt and reports you to the police for anti-social behaviour.

Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

why was the little girl crying? because her dad hit her.

What do you call a woman with a penis? A Hermaphrodite.

-Knock Knock -Who's there? -.......

how long does it take for a black woman to poop? depending on what she ate, about 5 to 10 minutes

Me: Knock Knock! You: Door's Open!

Q: What is hard and long on a man? A: His wife's funeral

What's worse than stepping on a lego? Being eaten alive by a man-sized spider.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer was arrested by the ASPCA and PETA for letting the chicken run free near a horribly busy road

Ice cream You scream We all scream Because there is a murderer killing our friends

What's black and white and red all over? And old fashioned television painted red.

whats red and smells like blue paint? Hank Kovalcik

Hey Tim lets think of a joke

Q: What is a African man with funny clothing and children straddling onto his back for dear life/ screaming in fear who only a few minutes ago before a particular incident made several young children cry and being chased by an authority figure? A: An intentionally inane circus performer partcipating in a scintillating rendition alongside his two children of who inadvertently frightened a small group of youth before he immediately decided to proceed by, during one of his extremely long, albeit few breaks, taking the members of his family on an interesting excursion to the nearby amusement park for occassional thrills. On the initial journey there, the black man, out of haste, accidentally dropped one of his children's most valuable toys of which elicited undeniably obnoxious bouts of sadness to come bursting out of his children's respective chests and an increased rate-of-travel for his wife of who accopanied him on his adventure and desired to assist him in his panic. In the spin of events, the man experienced an instance of hyper-activedness and spun out of control for a minute before eventually cooling down. Hence the screaming.

Your d*ck is short, If we compare it to mine. That was it, Thank you for your time.

When life throws you lemons, duck because they freakin' hurt.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because my first shot missed.

Q. How many pancakes can fit in a dog house? A. 0. Penguins don't like icecream.

A guy walks into a bar and says, "Ouch!"

A bear walks into a bar. The building is evacuated swiftly but several people are killed

what do you call a man with no arms and no legs? Bob

Knock, Knock. Come in.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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