Why did the one pound coin cross the road? It was stuck up the chickens ass

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A cow walks into a bar and says, "moo."

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There was a Mexican in a bomb shop ?

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Boom.

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How do you kill a blond? You don't. If you do, you'll get reported to the cops and sent to jail.

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Why did the fat man fall faster than the skinny man? He didn't. Masses does not affect the speed of falling objects. Everything with mass and volume falls with an acceleration of 9.81m/s^2 on Earth. Therefore the greater mass of the heavier man did not affect his falling speed. Both men fell at the same speed.

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Why did Jack and Jill go up the hill? To get to their house.

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Two blondes are walking down the street. One breaks her left high heel and the other is called Monica.

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Why did the chiken cross the road. Anwer: because it was being chased by a crazy horny/ kinky redneck.

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A Polish man came home one day from work, hung up his coat, took off his hat and walked into his bedroom shouting "honey I'm home!" What should he see but his best friend in bed with his wife. Infuriated, he rushed to the cupboard, pulled out his gun, put it to his head, pulled the trigger, and died instantly. His children and lecherous wife are forever scarred.

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A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender for 4 beers. The bartender replies, "One at a time, mate, will that work for you?" To which the man replies, "No", leaves, and drives his 1994 Toyota Corolla off of the road into the pit of a volcano.

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why do holocasut jokes make us laugh? i dont know you tell me

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Three nuns accidentally walked in to a bar and so they immediately went out.

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what did the girl trapped in the fire say? help

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What kind of animal eats and pisses on everything? Your mother. -Avery Vartanian

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What's the biggest difference between the East and West Coast? About 3,000 miles.

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Q: why did the boy cross the road A: because he was being chased by a pedophile

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know why, but I was standing on the other side of the road and I took it home and mamed the chicken with a powerdrill.

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Q. You are driving a car. In front of you there is a camion driving at your same speed. Behind you there is a helicopter flying at your same speed at the ground level. On your left there is an ambulance driving at your same speed and on your right there is a ravine. How do you get out from this horrible situation? A. Get off the carousel.

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why did aodhan not play BO2? Aodhan has Cerebral palsy.

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Jon has 40 chololate bars, he eats 32, what does he have now? Diabetes.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, She gave me AIDS, and I gave 'em to you! <3 <3

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What do you call a woman with a penis? A Hermaphrodite.

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and Santa Claus are on a plane. This is impossible because Santa Claus does not exist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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